Operation Absolute Magnitude
by WynneWin
Summary: Chapter 35 up! The 5 pilots and their ladies have another Operation ahead. Battle scars and emotional turmoil have not healed, since the last war. Will the suffering of the past drive them all crazy or against their allies? NEW: The mission and the chaos begins! Will they succeed at retrieving the essential data? FPV of all characters short chapters R&R!
1. Prologue and Chapter 1 : Mayumi

Prologue and Background Story

The year is AC198, a year after the end of Endless Waltz. Hiiro Yui is working as a personal bodyguard for higher ups in the Preventer Headquarters. Duo worked as a preventer for a couple side missions before returning to L2 to begin rebuilding the new Maxwell Church, along with Quatre's help. Trowa works in the circus while working as a Preventer for side missions. Quatre is working on various construction projects alongside the maganacs and joins the Preventers on private missions, for his strategic strengths. Wufei works as a Preventer as well, alongside Sally Po and other top Preventers.

(Characters Deleted from Gundam Wing for this stories purposes: Hilde Schweiker, She is disposable and any mention of her in Gundam Wing and Endless Waltz is replaced by Julie Maxwell instead.

Characters slightly changed: Meilan Chang, Wufei's wife, did not die and she changed her name to Mulan to hide the fact that she was still alive. )

Mayumi Yui: The daughter of the real Hiiro Yui. She was cryogenically frozen after her father was killed.

Julie Maxwell: Julie is the Fraternal twin sister of Relena and the younger sister of Milliardo. She was sent to L2 to the Maxwell Church orphanage and away from the public eye to protect her, while Relena stayed on Earth. Milliardo was unaware that his other sister was alive until Operation Meteor. Julie grew up with Duo in the Maxwell Church and fought by his side ever since.

Shiris Barton: The sister of the real Trowa Barton and Aunt to Marimaia.

Steph: Product of test tube babies.

Mulan Chang: Meilan Chang, who survived after Wufei thought she was killed. She reveals herself near the end of Gundam Wing, before Wufei goes off to fight Treize and gives him the strength to battle.

* * *

Staring. That's all it seemed to be these days. Staring, never saying a word to one another. I am convinced that he knows my secret... but what is he hiding?

"What?" a voice from across the table came. We were sitting across from each other, planning out the last of details for our next stage of action. Eyes so cold, so deadly, they could pierce through my heart in a second. He's the only one that can do that... Melt my heart? In a sadistic way, yes. It's much more complicated than that I fear... Something I cannot express through words. It left me aching, however.

I shrug, "Nothing, nothing at all..." I trail off, never taking my gaze off of him. I try to give him the same cold stare he is giving me, yet to no avail can I muster up enough demons to throw back at him. He takes the cake on that one. His eyes glint for a moment.

"Today's the day, isn't it?"

"Yes, Hiiro, it is..." I say tilting my head slightly. I find his topics of small talk to be forced the majority of the time.

"So..." He fixes his gaze at his gun in the center of the table. He intrigues me when he makes such small jesters. They are inviting almost... but with him, everything is stone cold and anything he touches turns to ice.

"Do you think the others will come?" I also gaze towards the gun, as Hiiro gets up and walks around the table.

"Wufei and Mulan still want their justice, so they will come..." He reaches toward the gun in the center of the table, "Trowa and Shiris? Seems probable..." He has his gun in his grasp and smoothes it with his left hand, "Duo and Julie, if they have any sense, they'll be here... but Quatre and Steph? I'm not so sure." He then points the gun straight at me, his cold icy stare piercing my inner soul, "And you, Mayumi?"

I paused for a moment before I sigh, "I've got my demons... and so do you." Not sure what that was supposed to imply, but it escaped my lips pretty quickly.

"Hm..." He mutters as he lowers his gun.

"This will be different from before, you realize that right?" He nodded and watched my movements. I smiled innocently, "This war is not just a battle between human beings, but it's a battle within ourselves as well... Only the strong will survive. Let's just hope the others realize that fact." He kept his stare on me as he walked closer.

"We'll all survive in a physical sense... that is certain."

"But the manipulation of the mind can be a dangerous reciprocation..."

"Very dangerous..." He was inches away from my face now. I kept my breath steady but my heart was beating out of its chest. One more movement and my heart mind erupt out of my rib cage.

"So what does that leave?"

"Leaves... this..." I grab him by the collar and pull him close. Leaning back, I fall out of my chair and he lands on top of me with a grunt. The next moments were utter chaos and passion. We are animals after all... Sex crazed wild animals. We might as well let out some steam before we get serious.


	2. Chapter 2 : Julie

"What do you think Julie?"

"About what?" I respond, opening my eyes slowly and turning my head. Duo is lying right next to me, his hands behind his head as we both lay on the soft grass. It was a nice day out, like that ever changes here. I turn on my side to face him more properly and open my eyes wide; as if silent signaling to him that he had my full attention. Which is rare nowadays…

"About this whole situation, you know? How is it that this got so bad so quickly?" Duo says with a hint of sadness as he stared up. I watched his eyes closely, they seemed to be unfocused, trailed into a distant land of thought. About the present I'm sure. I sigh deeply.

"Well… I think we all have to make a decision now… whether we want to fight or not. More battles, more bloodshed… It'll be the same as before… Yet…" I trailed off, still staring at his eyes. The glint in his eyes, shined and his gaze sharply turned to focus on me as I trailed off.

"Yet?" He questioned staring at me. He hid his real emotions, his face was calm but his eyes hid that sadness and fear behind a cloud of concern.

"Yet, we are different this time around. I feel that will have some sort of negative effect, won't it? Aren't we more emotional nowadays? We had so few concerns back then… It was easy to be programmed to fight and not ask questions… We've all started to _ask_ those questions-"

"We can't go back, can we?" Duo cut me off with a hint of spice in his words. That spice drove me wild at night. He was still looking at me with those eyes… Those beautiful bright violet eyes, which usually had that carefree tone, now have such sadness behind them. I stayed silent, allowing him to continue his train of thought. "We can't go back to that place, where we couldn't think for ourselves can we? Mission. We must not fail. That place was easier than this…" He starts to laugh, an awkward uncertain laugh. I touch his bicep and watch as I rub it gently. He turns his head, still in a bit of a laugh to watch me do so.

"It's okay, Duo…" I breathe, "You don't have to be strong all the time." I looked up at him to find him staring back at me. He smiles sweetly.

"I could say the same for you!" I return his smile with an uncertain one, I can only question what the next few days will really bring us and it makes me wrinkle my brow. We seem to be the type of people that hid behind our big smiles, as if to show the world that we are not afraid and take anything on with a laugh. What a joke... I'm surprised no one has called us out on that ridiculous fact...

"Were we pretending to be strong back then?" I whisper to him and close my eyes. Duo leans towards me and pulls me closer to him, embracing me with slight force, almost as if he would lose me to the gravity if he let go. I am in no way a damsel in distress when I have my weak moments, but I cannot lie that it feels quite nice to be in the arms of this man when I feel less than myself. I bury my head into his shoulder and wrap my arm around my waist. I hear him sigh and he squeezes me tighter.

"I can't lose you." He mumbles. I'm sure he didn't mean to say that out loud, but it slipped from his lips unconsciously. I pick up my head to look at him and he's looking at me with that goofy grin of his, "Woah, was that outta character or what?" I start to giggle for some reason or another, I think I might still be high... on that atmospheric aura around us. I lean my face closer to his, so that it's inches away and makes his face blur with colors.

"Ooh?" I annunciate every sound, teasing him slyly. He reacts by flipping himself over, with care, and hovers over me. He watches me for a moment with hungry eyes; they sparkle with a cool sensation like I've never seen. I can feel myself melting into the grass beneath me. I must have showed my reaction in my expression, since he smirked coolly at me after some time. He then lower himself inches away from my face.

"Well?"

"Well, indeed…" I trail off as I smile at the sudden bliss of this situation. He leans in for a deep kiss and all my troubles are forgotten. How he can do such a thing is beyond me. Clearly he is the only one to do so, since I cannot even make myself forget. He's some sort of superhero to my senses… or a villain perhaps? Whichever is sexier. After a few moments we separate and all of the sudden, the heaviness of reality is back in full swing. I'm sure Duo felt the same because his facial expression changed to a more serious one and he collapsed his body onto mine. I suddenly felt weak, as reality came crashing back into me. I mustered up my strength to place my right hand on Duo's head and rubbed it gently.

"I guess we need to go to the mission briefing then?" I state with an airy tone. Duo slowly lifts himself off of me and stands up. I'm still lying on the grass as he lowers a hand down toward me. At first, I simply lay in the soft rapture of the smooth grass beneath me. He waves his hand in front of me, probably wondering if I can see him. I smile and clasp his hand and his springs me up in one swift pull. We stand in front of each other for a moment, not sure which one of us will take that first step toward our new lives… or is it just a repeat of what happened to us before. War. It's hard to tell it apart sometimes. It's the same battles, the same bloodshed, and the same suffering all around. We are both standing there, thinking about what the future will bring us. Once we arrive for the briefing, our lives are in the hands of a battlefield unknown. I stare at him with vague sadness; can we really go through with this again? Are we still strong enough to survive not only the physical aspect, but also the mental? It seems far worse this time around…

I took the first steps, toward Duo and I wrapped my arms around his waist and tilted my head down on his chest. I wanted to cry, but I didn't have the energy to do so. Plus, that'd be incredibly unlike me to do so. Smiling sadly was the most I could do in a bad situation. I don't think I would have been able to produce tears to begin with. He took his right arm and wrapped it around my shoulders, while his left hand tilted my head up. He gave me a reassuring smile.

"We can do this. We're not alone after all!" He gave a stern nod while he was smiling down at me. I smiled back at him and gave my sound of an agreement.

What a pothole filled road... this road of ours is. Paradise has abruptly ended.


	3. Chapter 3 : Shiris

That cool breeze in my hair and the wind at my finger tips. Everything felt so in reach, but it was all passing by. So quickly, time goes by. It's all so fleeting. It feels like yesterday when we were fighting the last war... all together. We were all inseparable back then, weren`t we? I guess we were different back then. Or was it-

"Are you okay, Shiris? You`ve been really quiet all day." A voice cleared the daydream clouds out of my mind so promptly. I turned my gaze from the passing scenery outside to the one to my left. There he was, steering this ride with refinement, so peacefully. His jaw tightly locked up, sometimes I wonder if I just imagine him speaking out loud, since he`s usually so quiet.

"Yeah... I`ve just been thinking I guess." I breathe my response to him, like I was whispering to the wind outside.

"About what exactly?" He quickly glanced at me. I wonder if he`s able to read me any better than I can read him. We both keep our thoughts to ourselves most of time. It`s as if we don`t want to break the beautiful silence around us. To me, it feels romantic... with a hint of sorrow, which I find to be divine.

"Well... what this means. This war and the toll it will take on us this time around. Before, it brought us all together... but this time... this time-"

"You don`t need to say it." He cut me off and cut off my darker thoughts from continuing, "I believe some of the things that we will face are indeed inevitable. For war contains so much inevitability... However, we need to fight for what we believe in." I stared at him as his statement ended quite abruptly. We both speak in matter-of-factly statements, leaving not much room for hesitations. I kept my eyes focused on him for a few moments, but he kept his eyes on the road ahead. When he speaks in such ways, I cannot help but be silenced to thought.

The road ahead was so open and bright, the sun was shining on the pavement before us, making the air shine. I would catch myself drifting my gaze toward Trowa. He was so mystifying and so defined in his features. That jaw line... I contemplated the idea of reaching out to touch his face, but decided against my more romantic idealisms and froze my movements. I cannot figure him out and it leaves me wanting more... But I don't want to distract his driving too much.

"What about the others? Do you think everyone is okay?" I utter instead.

"What do you mean?" He asked as my mind went wondering again. I had heard some horrible rumors about my friends recently... and I didn`t want to bring them up to Trowa. I'm sure he wouldn't react with the same worry as I do with random details like that. Maybe if I never speak of them, there is no way for them to be true. This, as logic allows, cannot be true. Oh, how I desperately I want it to be. I must believe this, since I don't talk about myself much. I can somehow forget those traces of myself ever existed… until someone else brings them up.

"Not sure… I just wander if everyone is doing well. It has been almost a year." My mind cannot help but worry about everyone. We are, in one way or another, the family most of us never got to have. Rather dysfunctional one, if I may add…

"I`m sure Duo and Julie are their same upbeat selves... and Hiiro and Mayumi will never changed even if they wanted to." A small chuckle left Trowa`s lips, or a rapid series of 'hm's that is his version of a chuckle, which left me breathless for a few moments.

"Yeah... yeah..." I trailed off once again feel the cool breeze against my face. I felt a warm touch on my hand. Trowa had reached his hand over and grabbed my own gently. He raised it up to his lips and kissed the back of it gently. I smiled as he placed it back down to it's former position. I rested my other hand on top of his and he broke into a soft smile on his stern face, not taking his eyes of the road.

Things will change from here on out. At least I got to enjoy the small things for a little while.


	4. Chapter 4 : Steph

"Should we really go? I mean... this is just all so dangerous! Aren't you tired of fighting? Aren't you just sick of taking orders to murder people?" I screamed my last words in a sort of high pitched yell at him. I was worried and I was scared. I wasn't sure if I wanted to fight in this war this time around. We all shed enough blood and enough tears, didn't we?

"I think it's our duty as Gundam pilots to fight in this war... We don't have much of a choice." He trailed off as he kept packing more clothes into his suitcase, "Hurry up, you should get to packing as well, Steph." He hinted a bit of sadness, or was it innocence? I could never tell with him. Maybe I had the same type of tone in my voice. He's so familiar like that.

"Quatre, I... I don't want to go!" I was shocked at my tone. I think this is the first time I had ever raised my voice toward him. This is certainly uncomfortable territory for me... Maybe I should back down-

"Steph... listen to me and listen to me closely. We have to do this, we have to fight for these people. They cannot stand on their own two feet, so we must do it for them!" Quatre was so determined and set in his decision that I don't think anything could sway him at this point, not even me.

"...but..." My voice became weak all of the sudden and I was unable to speak. I was left to think of all the tragedy we will soon face in our missions. If I was the only one who _didn't_ fight in this, I feel as if I'd be shunned.

"Steph..." He walked over toward me as I stood in the door frame of our room. He grabbed a hold of my shoulders, I think if he wasn't holding on, I would have fallen to the floor, "Trust me, okay? We can do this! We need to be brave."

My weariness came over me, "Oh, Quatre... you push yourself so hard. I don't think I have the strength to keep up with you." Quatre reached down and grabbed both of my hands. He squeezed them tightly while gazing into my eyes.

"I will always be here, right by your side. There is no need to be afraid." His confidence was reassuring as I gazed back at him. I sighed deeply before nodding my head.

"Thank you, Quatre." I smiled at him sweetly, trying to hide the worry in my face. He kissed my forehead gently and returned to his packing. I watched him for a few moments, unsure whether my body could follow in suit. There is so much riding on these missions this time around. This is certainly no kids' stuff anymore.

We were lucky back then.


	5. Chapter 5 : Mulan

"Woman!"

"Will you knock it off already!" I shouted in anger, rubbing my temples to keep myself from exploding any further. What is it this time?"

"Where is my uniform? My _preventer _uniform? What have you done with it, woman?" Scowling as usual I see…

"I folded it and put it on the kitchen table, dear…" I shouted back as I was sitting at the kitchen table staring at his uniform neatly placed next to mine. I gave a little smirk to myself and rubbed both my hands together. He may be the overpowering type to people who don't know him… but he would never get anything done without me. This he knows. Suddenly, he appeared in the doorway. Eyes slightly narrowed as he looked from me to the uniform then back to me again. He gave a slight grunt, which I have dubbed his 'grunt of thanks'. He is usual too proud to admit when he is wrong and especially when I am right. Forming real words when he is angered isn't his style.

"What time are we supposed to be there?" He asked in a more calm tone as he picked his uniform up, inspecting ever inch of it.

"I believe around noon? That's what Hiiro said on the phone…" I trailed off thinking back to the brief conversation I had with Hiiro yesterday. Everything seemed so sudden and something seems off with the vague information we were given about this current war-like situation. It is all quite secretive, but when is Hiiro not? 'Details are unimportant at this time' I can hear him say as I recall the conversation. Wufei was so hot headed that he instantly agreed to go. I am not as hot headed… however; I found I didn't have the strength to say 'no' in this situation. I'm not sure why that is…

"I guess we need to get going then." Wufei gave a nod toward me and I got up from my chair, feeling slightly heavier than usual I dragged my feet toward him. Wufei stood and watched as I slowly walked over to him, "Why so sluggish?" He questioned as I grabbed my uniform.

"It's all very sudden." I said with a bit of sadness, I was just getting used to our quiet life. Wufei put a hand on my shoulder with rare gentleness seeping from his fingertips.

"It is as sudden as it was when the war ended last time… Which was something that I had a hard time accepting. At least I can live with purpose again." He paused for a moment before looking at me, "It is about justice." I placed my hand on his and I gave him a warm smile.

"Yes, yes it is."

We walked out of the door, not knowing if we'd be coming back anytime soon.


	6. Chapter 6 : Hiiro

It's like awakening out of a daze. I lifted my head to look at the woman underneath me. She was panting slightly and gave a slight chuckle of sorts. Is this what it is like to be addicted to drugs? I cannot get enough of her.

"You're heavy you know…" Mayumi exclaimed through her chuckles. I lower my head and roll off her to lie my back onto the cold floor. It feels cool against my bare skin… Wasn't I wearing a shirt- oh yeah…

"I should take a shower." I state in a dry monotone and Mayumi burst out laughing. I'm glad she finds my dry humor funny, though I'm not sure I was joking. She is quite different when she is around me. She lets her guard down easily, I'm not sure why. You'd think she'd be more comfortable with Julie and Shiris. She trusts me a great deal it seems… I almost feel bad for hold back all my secrets from her. _Almost_.

"Yeah," She tries to cover her mouth to muffle her laughs to no avail, "Try to look presentable Mr. Perfect Soldier!" She turns to look at me. Her face was glowing. I could never tell her that I find her stunning. That is unlike me. I can only telepathically express such a slur of 'romantic' tone of words. God, she's beautiful. She quickly turned to look at me. Did she hear me? I raised my eyebrow at her.

"What?"

"Who are you most excited to see tomorrow?" Her random questioning boggled my mind for a few moments. I sit up briskly, looking toward the table.

"Excited? Hm." I wanted to laugh, but felt no need to do so. She knew it was a stupid question that I didn't want to answer, but, "I guess Duo." Mayumi raised an eyebrow this time; "His attitude, when I am giving my mission briefs, is consequently up-to-the-minute and makes me frequently angry… nevertheless, I can never be mad at him. He is simply Duo."

"I see…" Mayumi sighed and sat up slowly.

"Interesting, isn't it?" I turn to look at her and she's staring back at me.

"Well, you guys are good friends, I guess friends with different personalities keep us sane, right?" Ignoring her last statement I continue forward.

"And you?" I ask and she ponders for a few moments, leaving the air quite stiff.

"Well, Shiris is always so calm and collected at times like this. It'll be nice to be around that again." I nodded in agreement.

"Same goes for Trowa."

"Julie on the other hand, I got mixed signals with her the last time I spoke to her on the phone." My questioning face led her to continue, "She seemed… off. Like something was wrong. I couldn't put my finger on it at the time."

"Off?" with more monotone in my voice than I intended.

"Yes, off." She rubbed her head gently and continued, "It's probably nothing…" The way she trailed her sentence into a sour note made me think that there was something she wasn't mentioning. I decided to not press this issue any further.

"Julie is Julie. She's always off." I said nodding toward Mayumi. She shrugged slightly and had a stern look on her face.

"I'll just see how she is today-"

"I do wonder if Quatre will be able to handle all of this, this time around." Cutting off her statement abruptly. I didn't intend to be rude, but I'd rather ponder something else before the mission briefing… Why Quatre popped into my head first, I am uncertain. Why didn't I just blurt out some details of the mission parameters? "I don't want to kill him if matters get out of hand." Well, at least it is a change of subject.

"He'll have Steph to keep him sane-" Mayumi stated, following along.

"What you could do for me," I cut her off again as I stand up. I have a habit of doing so when it comes to the missions. My mind cannot leave those boundaries I have set up in regards to what needs to be completed for success. I was programmed that way after all. I must have subconsciously lower my hand down to Mayumi because I felt her grasp my hand and I pull her up to a standing position without hesitation.

"And what may that be?" She said as she stood in front of me with one hand on her hip. I can imagine her voice saying '_Stop cutting me off!_' but her mind follows procedures like my own.

"I need each preventers folder printed and ready on the table before they arrive." I state, not looking at her and looking at the mission board. All the mission preliminary tasks were placed on the board: from maps, to weapons provided, to gadgets. Everything was prepared, thanks to Jane; who would never bother herself to come and talk directly to us. I never bothered to question why. That's just the way she is.

"Okay, okay." Mayumi said with a wave and she turned and walked out of the room. She swung her hips seductively. Or is that how she walks normally? Regardless I had to think about the mission. Plus, I need to take a shower.


	7. Chapter 7 : Duo

I wrap my arm around her shoulders to reassure her, picking up both our tiny packs with my other hand, and we walked down the grassy hill to the pavement. The digital clock in the distance dinged a couple times, signaling on the hour. Our express shuttle was waiting for us… and by waiting for us; I really mean it will leave if we don't get there in 10 minutes. I wouldn't call us procrastinators; we get pleasure from living on the edge a little. Plus, we were enjoying each other's company. Nothing wrong with that! We still have to make it back to Earth from L2. We might be a little late getting to the base, but that wouldn't be so out of character for us, now would it? I hear Julie sigh, almost as if she could read my mind.

"We're gonna be late aren't we?" I flashed my winning grin at her as she raised her brow at me. I relaxed my arm around her shoulder and let it drift to her hand.

"Not if we run!" Knowing she wouldn't protest, I held her hand tightly and started at a run. Thankfully the shuttle station wasn't far from where we were and we arrived with time to spare! That is, about 2 minutes. The man by the shuttle door looked less than pleased.

"Tickets?" He asked with a stern look. He was getting ready to point toward the metal detector.

"Here you are good sir!" I say with a big grin, handing him our tickets, "and that won't be necessary!" I motioned toward the metal detector and retrieved my preventer badge from out of my pocket, "Have a look at this, if you will." The man stared at the badge for a few moments, then back to me, to which I smiled brightly, trying my best to match the big grin on my picture. He looked back at the badge and then looked Julie up and down. Julie smiled sweetly and flashed her eyelashes, her badge in hand as well. He did the same stare with Julie, except exaggerating his gaze for quite some time…

"I see…" The man said with a not-so-pleasant smile. Julie looked as if she would grab her gun out of her pocket, as to show this man exactly _why_ we weren't going through the detector. I, however, would rather not have a confrontation. We're already late as it is!

"Well, then!" I open my arms and allow Julie to walk in front of me onto the shuttle, "Best we let the pilot get this shuttle going, shall we?" Julie shook her head, giving a slight laugh, as she walked through the door. I wave my hand at the man with a slight bow, I am a gentleman after all, and I head aboard the shuttle.

We had the first two seats in first class and I throw our bags into the overhead compartment before plopping down next to Julie, sinking into my seat.

"Pretty comfortable, huh?" I say, turning my head to look at her. She giggled with her hand balled into a fist over her mouth and nodded. I'm never sure if she's giggling because she thinks I'm being stupid or because I'm being adorable. I'd like to go with the later!

"That's what our badges get us," She said waving her badge in my face, "First class and no questions asked! Gotta love Jane for these!" I grab her badge from her hand and inspect it, while she gives me a questioning look.

"It says you have blue eyes…" I look from her badge to her face and back, "Huh? Who'd have known!"

"Ha, ha, ha!" She sarcastically laughs at me and grabs her badge out of my hand. Even if you were legally blind, you'd still be able to see her gorgeous eyes. They shine the brightest blue I've ever seen. She wrinkles her nose at me as I kept staring at her face. It's hard to take my eyes off of her sometimes. She's just perfect. She tilts her head and smiles sweetly at me since I was still staring at her, "What?" she questions and all I can muster is a big stupid grin. She drives me crazy with her looks. She has a sort of power over me, but saying that makes me sound mushy.

"…nothing!" I say closing my eyes and shaking my head, while I lift my hands up in surrender. I feel a light tap on my nose and quickly open my eyes. She had poked my nose. I was ready to stare at her beauty again, but the voice of the captain broke me out of my 'Julie' world.

"This is your captain speaking abroad Colony L2 flight 27 to New York, United States, Earth..."

_Earth..._ It's been a while. I glanced at Julie and she has her head down, fiddling with her fingers. She's nervous, about something. I reach my hand and grab hers tightly, squeezing for a moment before relaxing. She doesn't look up, just smiles. I turn my gaze to the individual TVs before us flashing safe precautions, etcetera, etcetera... Things we don't need to hear anymore. Once you go through war, precautions are droning and rather pointless.

"Do you think anyone has changed?" Julie's voice takes me out of my thoughts and I turn to face her again. She has a bit of a stern look on her face, yet she's smiling back at me.

"Changed? Nah... probably not. It's not even been a year!" I squeeze her hand again since I feel her still twitching. What has got her so anxious?

"Shiris was a little distant in her messages… and Steph, unsurprisingly, seemed like a nervous reck!" Her face showed her mix of emotions in that one sentence.

"I guess we'll see how they really are when we arrive." I said with less confidence than I should have.

"Do you think we have changed?" She asks, still keep her gaze down. I worry but I still tease her.

"Probably, we are pretty weird." I say with a chuckle, she cracked a smile and looked at me. She giggled... Oh that giggle.

"Yeah, we are, aren't we?" Her eyes got really big for a moment. I settle into my seat more, enjoying the moment.

"I can't wait to see the guys to be honest." I say out loud. Not sure if I meant to say that, not very manly like... but it is true. She giggles again.

"Oh? You miss your boy talk?" She exclaimed with a sarcastic tone. I pondered her words for a moment, watching my hand on hers.

"Yeah… I guess I do!" I said, oh-so-matter-of-factly. I imagined her thinking, 'You're so mindless!' as she giggled again.

"You mentioned before that Quatre sounded good on the phone?" She tilted her head, I wasn't sure if she was stretching her neck or trying to look at me better. Let's go with the later.

"Yeah, you know how he is! Always willing to please. I mean, hell, I don't think I could thank him enough for his help with the new Church! He calls it nothing more than 'atonement', but he's really just a nice guy a heart." I say slightly shaking my head. Quatre, he really does blame himself for everything.

"He's sweet. I guess with his installment of 'atonement', he helped us with ours…" Julie smiled sadly.

"Yeah…" I trailed off in agreement. I know she was thinking about the past. At least we can call those memories as the 'old' Maxwell church. It's nice to bring back the name without the word tragedy behind it.

"I miss all the girls." Julie said suddenly as she leaned back into her seat, "I'm upset we had to separate after how close we all got during the last war." She happily smiled when saying this, but her eyes look a bit distressed when those words escaped her lips. I want to say I know Julie very well, like I know myself, but when her eyes get that way… I often wonder what she's hiding behind. She rarely let's that smile fade from her face. I guess I do the same. I turn toward the window of the shuttle and realize we had already taken off. How time goes by unknowingly when I'm with her.

She'll be the death of me, that's for sure.


	8. Chapter 8 : Trowa

I let go of her hand and gripped the steering wheel. Something is always on her mind, but she never seems to bring up any sort of topic. I don't press her on such issues, considering I tend to do the same. Keeping peace within tranquility. Small talk is rather unnecessary in times like theses; it's just us after all. The road to our base seems endless at times like these. Not only is it in the middle of nowhere, but also our minds drifting off to what is in store for us next has our guards built up. We've built those walls back up rapidly when we heard the news about the war. We knew what was the next stage, our involvement. Whenever I think about the word 'fear' and what it means to me; before, before as in the last war, I don't think I could comprehend such a feeling. Maybe I have become softer during that time, but when I think of her I cannot help but glance at her. Which I caught myself doing just a moment ago.

"Trowa?" I heard her faintly call my name, bringing me out of my developing thoughts. She turned to face me better, "You said you talked to Hiiro briefly on the phone about the mission?"

"Yes… and when I said briefly, I was exaggerating."

"What exactly did he say?" Her eyes widened a bit, wanting some sort of information to prepare herself with before she arrives to the base.

"Well…" I trail off a bit, trying to recall exactly what Hiiro had mentioned, "He had said, 'This is important, vital to the war, and I want you to be apart of this team. I need you and Shiris.'" I say with a dry monotone and saw Shiris blink a few times out of the corner of my eye.

"Did he personally contact everyone?" Shiris questioned, mostly to herself, I'm not if she was asking me or not. I answered anyway.

"I'm not sure, but knowing Hiiro, when it comes to these missions, he knows how vital each of us are." I gave a slight nod as I finished my sentence and Shiris tapped her fingers on her thigh.

"I can't imagine a team with one of our members not there… It'd be so… incomplete." I nodded in agreement. There was something about our group that worked. We all had incredibly different personalities, ways we viewed each other, and ourselves and through all odds we've become the greatest of friends. There's nothing like a bloody battlefield during a war to bring strangers together.

"We'll be there soon." I said in a content way. That was rather unlike me.

"You sound excited to see everyone." She said with a smile. I glance at her quickly and she's still smiling at me. He hair was gently framing her face and the light from the sun was glossing her skin perfectly. I have my romantic moments, yes. Too bad I'm not so upfront about them. I guess I was excited. Sometimes you forgot what you hold dear until it sudden disappears from your radar.

"We'll probably be the first ones there… I doubt Duo and Julie will make it back from L2 in time." I tried to give a chuckle of sorts, but no sound came out. Those two… they are unpredictable in a rather predictable way.

"I sincerely think that Steph can't handle it this time around." Shiris said hurriedly, her caring nature seeping through, though sometimes it's hidden by her abrasive way of saying things.

"She's like Quatre, she takes things very personally." I paused for a moment before continuing, "Her and Quatre's kindness are needed in times like these. I think the rest of us forget to be as human as they are. Nevertheless, we are indeed human and forgetting such a thing will only lead us to troubled times ahead. Being strong without a purpose makes our actions worthless."

"Where do emotions play in all this? Since we've all grown up in a sense over the last year." I thought she'd say something along those lines.

"We react when we ourselves deem it is necessary. That I have always followed. Both overreaction and under reaction lead to a bitter end." I vaguely recall saying this before, I just cannot remember if it was to Shiris or not. She slowly nodded, I'm assuming because she was thinking about my words with a mixture of her own thoughts.

"Somehow, I have an uneasy feeling, but I am not worried. We are all very good at what we do." She said with confidence. I agree with her completely. We all have our strengths that by far outweigh our weaknesses. With new strengths, brings new weaknesses, I fear.

Hopefully this new war won't surprise us with new limitations we were unaware of.


	9. Chapter 9 : Quatre

We both finished backing our suitcases and headed downstairs. Through the massive long hallways we took strides in silence. I was walking in front of Steph, so I wouldn't have to see her face. I know she is completely against us going, but I believe her guilt isn't allowing her to stand up for herself. I just didn't want to see her face; it might break my heart a little. Guilt… I'm accountable for so many things, wrongs that I have done, I feel as though I need to make something right in the world. Enough though there was a brief moment of peace once the last war ended... It never seemed quite enough.

"Shou- Should I make some tea before we head out?" I hear Steph's voice call before I open the door to the garage. She had stopped half way down the last hallway, next to the entrance to the kitchen. I sigh and motion with my hand for her to follow. She nods after some hesitation and follows suit. I open the door to the garage and see Rashid standing there next to the bright white limo. I greet Rashid with a bright smile.

"You ride awaits Master Quatre." Rashid greets back with a slight bow and opens the door.

"Thank you, Rashid." I bow my head and slide into the limo seat. After a few moments Steph follows. I heard Rashid throw our luggage in the back and a moment later was in the driver's seat. Steph was sitting almost painfully upright he her hands neatly placed in her lap. I can only worry about how she will take all this. If she buckles under the pressure, I'll have to step in and tell her to return home. She cannot jeopardize our missions and our lives by this sort of hesitation. However, I understand how she is feeling.

"Hiiro didn't mention any details did he? On the phone that is?" Steph inquired, still sitting perfectly still in her upright position. I gave a small sigh.

"He's never been the type to articulate details before the time comes…" I nod in agreement with myself, "We have to wait and see what this will involve to be for us."

"I don't think Mulan should go!" Steph suddenly blurting out. She quickly over her mouth and looked at me, almost as if she was wondering if she had said what she did out loud. I slowly tilt my head and throw a stern questioning glare at her.

"What do you mean? What have you heard?" I questioned forward as she slowly lowered her hands back down to her lap.

"I…" She said with a slow breath but paused shortly after. I blinked a few times at her, trying to get her to say more. No good. What is the world overcome her to say that? I thought at first she'd say 'I' instead…

"Stephanie." I assumed a more demanding tone in my voice. She gave me a weary look and I raised an eyebrow at her. I didn't need to say anymore.

"Quatre… Mulan is… pregnant." She said the last bit in a whisper. My eyes slowly widened once her words processed.

"Wh- what?" was the only word I could muster out of my mouth at the time. How did _that_ happen? More importantly does-, "Wufei, does he know about this?" Steph opened her mouth, but no words escaped. She then shook her head vigorously.

"Are you ready to leave, Master Quatre?" I heard Rashid's voice come from the speakers. I grabbed Steph's hand gently and look at her. She gave a sad smile and a nod, trying to be brave I believe. With this news… I have a long car ride ahead of me.

"Yes, Rashid. We are all ready." I say with a big sigh. It's almost like I'm dreaming this. Not only does the past seem to be repeating itself, but we might be completely different people this time around. How will this affect our fighting abilities… and more importantly the outcome of this war?

At least this time around I'll be fighting with close allies. No… not allies.

Friends.


	10. Chapter 10 : Wufei

The private jet was waiting outside for us. Once I heard the news from Mulan that Hiiro had called, I was not one bit surprised. The war never ended. We only had a brief dead heat in action. It was foolish for others to think that peace was obtainable after such the complete and utter chaos that erupted. Harmony does not seem to be reachable for long periods of time. It is unnatural and it is a made up concept by humans. Weakness is all I see.

"Hold on, Steph is trying to call me." I hear Mulan say as she takes her phone out. I wave my hand back toward her; mainly ignoring her world and board the plane. No point in wasting time, and if there is any importance to Steph's word, she will let me know. Otherwise, I will not be bothered. I am only focused on the mission that will be relevant in the near future. It has taken far too long. It is time we fight for what is right. Whether blood is shed or lives are lost, that is the image of war. That is our justice. We are meant to fight and I cannot give up such a sentiment easily.

I must have been laying in my thoughts, because I did not notice that Mulan had already boarded the plane and was sitting across from me. She was watching me when I came out of my thoughts, as though waiting for me to realize that she was there. I nod towards her.

"We are ready to take off when you are, captain!" Mulan turns around and tells the captain of the plane. A hear a muffled confirmation from the captain and in no time we are in the air. Maybe I'll be able to sleep on the ride there, since last night my adrenaline was acting up and I was unable to sleep. Instead I went to workout in the guan and sent all of my previous rage into my sword. Mulan was up as well, I assuming worrying about something, like all women do. Women… I could see Mulan giving me a look as if not amused about something.

"What?" I ask in a displeased tone. She was disturbing my thoughts with her precarious staring. This annoys me.

"I have nothing to say to you if you use a tone like that." She threw back in a dry casual way. She is infuriating sometimes, but she keeps me leveled somehow. I breathe deep.

"I'm sorry, what is the matter?" I ask in a more polite method. She raises her eyebrow in question to my tone of voice but continues regardless.

"I find it peculiar that this is all happening now. Why wasn't this sooner? Why the sudden change?" I'm sure she wasn't asking me these questions, but rather talking out loud to herself. I decided not to answer and nodded in agreement. Furthermore, It's not like I had an answer to those kinds of questions. Only Hiiro has the answers. Answers I will drag out of him by the tip of my sword, if must be.

I am in no way a patient man, and I believe that I have waited long enough for this moment to arrive.


	11. Chapter 11 : Mayumi, Jane's Love

Click. Print. Print. Print. Everything seems to be in order. All the necessary details prepared and set… That took longer to organize than I thought… no wonder Hiiro told me to do it. I do not blame him; given that he has looked through these details thoroughly over the last few days. Come to think of it he's barely slept. Come to think of it _I've_ barely slept.

I stared at the blank screen for a moment, essentially gazing past the screen and into my inner thoughts. Mission parameters, check. Necessary equipment, check. Uniforms, check. Travel information, check. We've check over every last detail… so why does my thoughts still go through this imaginary checklist in my head. I need some time to think for myself for a moment… make sure I'm still somewhat sane. Those types of thoughts remind that a part of me is still human. I think I'm more on the edge than I was previously aware.

I feel a vibration in my pocket. Jane, on my phone, with a concise message; 'Video Chat ASAP.' I feel my chest tighten slightly as I click, click for the video line. I should be more concerned than I find myself to be, but my drone nature gets the best of me. Moments after, Jane's stern hard face appears on the screen. She's in a dark room, which adds to the creases distinguishing more shadows on her face. She seems relatively menacing and malevolence on video. In person, she's far worse…

"Is this line secure?" She questions with her polite British tongue. Even before she asks, I'm already frantically typing in codes and cutting off further access from any other sources to guard a private discussion. This is routine.

"Yes, we are on a secure line." I nod toward her, finishing my typing. I study her movements closely as she lifts her head and clears her throat. Watching her do so makes my skin itch and a hint of dread spreads through my veins. She is not the type of person to arrive with good news; her words shoot poison one way or another. I only speak to her when prompted to do so. I merely wait for her to begin cutting off the oxygen flow with her language.

"Yes, very good." She said after a few moments, "Have you made the necessary preparations?"

"Yes," I reply in a dry tone, "All is done."

"You checked?"

"Yes."

"You _double _checked?"

"Yes." No wonder when it comes to missions, my obsessive actions tend to me rechecking everything…

"Yes… I went through the particulars as well." She pauses abruptly, "Very good." She slowly nods her authorization at me. Approval from the Head… I feel my back relax into the cushion of the seat further. Our conversations are always to the point. I've learned she never dwells on pointless emotions like feelings. Especially sympathy. Such is the strong levelheaded woman known as Jane.

"Mayumi, I am counting on you to relay any information to me about the pilots…" I nod, Jane rarely surprises me anymore with her requests, "Furthermore, I demand every pilot take a physical, have blood work done, and a thorough investigation into their activities form the past year before your departure." My throat closes in an uncomfortable manner, I retract my previous thought.

"Blood work? An investigation, what in th-" I quickly cut off my oxygen as to stop the words from escaping my mouth. Seeing her face wrinkle in disapproval from my insolence brought that tightness back into my chest. Silence filled the air as Jane waited. What does this all mean? I'm staggered that she would bring up something as estranged as that. I need to hid my thoughts, it's as if she can hear me… I'm debating whether to even think about what this all means now, knowing that she is observing my slight change of facial expressions with every thought. Allowing me to sit in my mind, to see if I boil over with inquires again… She has manipulative mannerisms.

"Do not question me." She said in an arctic tone after a few moments, her eyes so narrow that the shadows have swallowed them from the light. Her lips held tight against each other. What a demonic women. Her words bring me back to the days when I was cryogenically frozen, unable to move. That is an unsightly power. I slowly nod.

"Yes, Ma'am."

"Tell Hiiro about this as well and prepare a lab for after the briefing. I will contact again at 1500 for the results. After, you will have an hour to board the jet and ready the necessary equipment." She then lowered her head and her voice, "I have my reasons, and if you question me again I will have you destroyed, is that understood?" Any other person would have been absolutely terrified by her choice of words. I, however, know enough about Jane to know that this is the only sentence she has ever muttered that is a downright lie. It is only said to keep me on a short enough lease, so as I do grow wanderlust. I nod and the screen turns to black. I cannot help but let out a deep sigh.

My mind is now roaming off to exactly what this all means. I do not have time for this, besides answers are in grasping reach.

"Interesting..." Hiiro's voice called out from behind me. I turn my head around and I see him leaning against the doorframe, with a towel draped around his shoulders. He quickly rustled his hair with the towel end to stop some of the droplets from dripping down his face. I can't help but watch his silhouette in the doorframe, every muscle, and every feature...

"Interesting indeed," I say with a deep sigh, he doesn't need to know what I'm thinking, "Do you have any ideas as to why she's inquiring about all of us?" I watch as Hiiro shakes his head back and forth. I bring myself out of the door and walk toward him.

"There's no telling what exactly she is planning for all of us." Hiiro said with a stern look.

"She works in mysterious ways. I won't say I'm worried but-"

"Don't then." He cuts me off abruptly, "We have a mission ahead of us. There is no time for juvenile questioning... In addition, someone has arrived..." I watch as he walks back into the hallway and back to the briefing room. I need to stop my thoughts from forming so prematurely.

Everything will fall in place. This I must believe in.


	12. Chapter 12 : Julie, Meeting up

I feel a gentle poke, poke on my arm. I'm stirring. Why am I stirring? Huh? What happened? Did I fall asleep? I open my eyes abruptly, trying to remember where I am. I turn to my left and Duo is sitting there smiling at me. I feel quite cheery all of the sudden.

"You fell asleep for a while!" He exclaimed rubbing his chin a bit, "Can you believe it, we're almost there. Earth, Julie… Did you ever think we'd be back on Earth?" Reality set in as I watched his excited facial expressions with each spoken word. In those short moments after waking from a dream, I find it harder to recall what reality is. We're still pilots, fighting in a never-ending war. I'd much rather be the princess I was dreaming about just a few instants ago. Instead, I am the bloody battle ridden princess fighting for unattainable peace. I forget that nuance of myself sometimes. I by no means had the chance to act as princess that I am, unlike my sister Relena. I was never meant to be a fitting puzzle piece into royal anyway...

"Earth…" I let that word escape my lips and my gaze follows to the shuttle window. We're almost on ground. Duo is still looking at me with his big puppy dog eyes. He wants something, I can tell.

"Before Quatre picks us up, why don't we enjoy some good ol' real earth air? I swear all this processed stuff has been sending my senses into a rage!" I cannot help but giggle at him; he does make me feel better. I'm still foggy from my dream, at least that is what I want to believe, but I nod in agreement.

The shuttle lands swiftly and we are the first to get off the shuttle. You'd think the security from the colonies into earth would be incredibly tight, but it's the complete opposite. Earth had to lessen many of it's strict border control after the war ended. Apparently there are more important matters to attend to then the safety of Earth citizens. The colonies, however, would never allow such a thing to happen. The Earth hasn't become a barren wasteland yet, makes me question what really goes on down here…

I walk behind Duo as we exit the shuttle station onto the busy city streets. Duo stretches his arms out wide and breathes in deep. He turns to look at me, but doesn't say anything. With one look he makes my heart melt… damn him.

"Where to? You know Quatre will be here any minute, he's always early after all." I bring myself to stand beside him. He's still gazing out into the world around us. He seems rather reckless; he must not have slept on the ride. I follow his gaze out into the crowds before us.

"Well…" He breathed, still watching all the commotion of the city, "Thinking of that already, I told Quatre to pick us up at the wrong station, so-o-o… we have to walk anyway!" I give a sort of body-tensed jerk as he finished his sentence. How does he _still_ surprise me with the things he does? I slowly turn my head to look at him and I find him staring back at me. I merely wrinkle my nose at him, to which he gives me a silent 'what?' followed by a big grin. He then opens his arm, like a gentleman escort, and flashes his winning smile at me.

"Shall we?" He asks in a polite tone. I smack his arm before I slide my own through. After all, I can't resist such a man with magnificent charm. How does he do this? How can he simply steal my heart for his own and never let go? I'm captive and I love it.

"You're going to get us in trouble, you know!" I coolly say as we begin walking. He was already taking no notice of my words. I follow in suit. My eyes rapidly go every which way as I take in the scenery before me. The busy body people, the piercing sounds from cars, the exorbitant buildings, and that real sky… Taking it all in is like a sense overload. Nothing like the real deal…

My mind feels a bit dizzy trying to process all this information. However, I find this 'real air' to be overall unsatisfactory. It's too bona fide, it that makes any sense, but it creates such a different feeling. Doesn't do much for me, that's all. I find myself gripping Duo's arm harder and I nudge in closer to him. I must have brought him out of his blissful state, since I felt his arm tense up. As we reach the entrance to a park nearby, I hold back a fighting urge to tackle him. I want to lay peaceful in the grass again, pretend we are on L2 and watch the clouds go by. I wonder if anyone else gets that feeling of being trapped inside your own body; unable to do the movements you crave to do. Lack of spontaneous movements makes me rather unhappy. I want to say something to Duo, but I finding myself at a loss of words. I spot a long white limo in the distance on the other side of the park. Quatre, he's always riding in a luxurious way.

When did we stop walking? Duo's standing in front of me with his big violet eyes staring and I can't remember what just happened. He's giving me a look.

"Are you alright?" He usually doesn't question me, but he has an unease look on his face. I smile at him with a natural glow. How else am I supposed to react to a question like that?

"What do you mean?" I say in a bit too cheerful. He'll see right throu-

"Come on, Julie…" Duo said sliding his hands in his pockets and rocking back on his heels. He gets nervous when he poses questions like that, and his eyes get bigger as he looked at the ground below him. I let out a nervous laugh and play with the long ends of my hair.

"I just feel a little light headed, that's all!" I lied. Well, it's not a lie per say… in fact; I'm not sure why I said what I said. I guess brushing off the topic of myself in a natural sounding way, isn't a skill of mine. He rubbed the brim of his nose and I instantaneously felt bad. He's bad at showing how concerned he gets sometimes and I love him for trying. I grab a hold of the front of his shirt and he brings his gaze to look at mine. He lets out a small 'hm?' sound, one I could die for.

"I'm okay." I breath with a nod. He doesn't need to worry about me; we've got much more pressing matters ahead of us today after all. I push onto my toes and give him a quick kiss on the lips. Once he relaxes, a devilish grin forms on my lips.

"… Race ya!" I stick out my tongue and head for the limo. I hear a form of an 'o ho ho!' sound escape him and suddenly I feel an arm wrap around my waist pull me back and suddenly my feet lift the ground. Before I know it I'm slung over his shoulder and he is casually walking forward. All I can see is his well firm derrière and the ground below.

"Aaa! Put me down!" I laugh, such a joy-filled laugh as he starts humming to himself, ignoring my pleas. I couldn't stop laughing. I knew this would be the last real heartfelt laugh I'd be able to get for a while…

I might as well let it all out...

Forgetting the gundams and forgetting our lives as pilots would be torture. That is how we live and we cannot deny such a fact. This boy is a part of me just like I am a part of him. Without them, we are left nothing but shards of our self. Shards of memories that are not whole. If we forget this than we are forgetting ourselves. I do not want to live in a shadow of a broken person. I want to fight on.

That is what I believe in and that is what I want to fight for. I believe the others feel that part of their soul burning as well.


	13. Chapter 13 : Shiris, Finding base

I check my forearm. It sparkled with LCD lights forming just above my skin. The only equipment we got from Hiiro yesterday was this. Little microchips, placed carefully over our wrist, which held the capacity to store a 100GBs of information and other necessary applications we deemed useful. Fairly handy, to be perfectly honest. Trowa and I had wanted to try them out before we arrived. We wanted to know as much as we could once the briefing began. Saying that, there really isn't much more information we have.

"Looks like we'll arrive in a couple minutes. Did Hiiro even mentioned what this place looked like? If it was even visible?" I asked Trowa, hopefully we won't pass it.

"No... nothing about any sort of details. I assumed it would be visible if he didn't mentioned anything." I hestitated my stare as I looked from the map to the road and back to the map.

"It says well be arriving in 100 meters but..." I look back to the road, "There's... nothing here!" I suddenly became rather irritated. Why would Hiiro not bother with any information about our base? I know we did some circus work, but we are _not_ mind-readers! How does he expect us to find a base that isn't there? Maybe I should have called Mayumi myself, perhaps she had some information from Jane? What are we missing here-

The car came to an abrupt stop. Trowa had stopped the car in the middle of the road, right where the map says we should. He turned his head to look at me, with such intense eyes, like a wild beast. I hold my breath for a moment as I feel a sensation come over me. Have you ever lost your breath in a moment? It's tempting to say that he does this often; I find his way of nature to be so intense I forget how to function as a human being. Though, I'd certainly never say that out loud. He gives a small smile before opening the car door and getting out. Is he even aware of what he does to me? I breathed deep, regaining some oxygen into my lungs, before stepping out of the car. I raise my head over the top of the car. Trowa's leaning his back on the driver side, with his arm in the air, staring at the map. Even the back of his head is gorgeous... Did I honestly just think that? I am glad for the thought filter I have... Julie on the other hand...

"Well... We are in the right spot." Trowa said bringing his arm down. I shake my head.

"We must be the first ones here. I doubt anyone else has a better idea to where this place is." I breathe as I turn myself to look around more thoroughly. It's a desert. Miles and miles of horizon around us. For some reason or another I think back to the memories of my family. Barron like this desert must be the connection in my mind. Everyone is dead, except for my niece Mariemaia. The Barton family was so tortured, one way or another. I guess I am no different-

"Shiris!" I turn my head and Trowa is waving his hand back and forth. I walk around the car and look at him. He's smiling at me.

"What?" I questioned, but I didn't need an answer. I look at where his feet were placed, and there was some sort of black beam underneath the sand. I look back up and him and he's smiling.

"Who would have thought, huh?" I give a quick laugh. You've got to be kidding me. I'm fairly confident that we will not have any uninvited guests during our mission briefing. I watched Trowa bend down and brush off some sand. The ground started to shake violently underneath us and I grab hold of Trowa's shirt to keep myself from falling over. The ground before us started to part and lift up out of the sand, showing an massive underground tunnel. Once the entrance way was fully opened, the ground stopped shaking. I shook off some of the sand that fell into my hair.

"I think Quatre had something to do with the construction work on this base." Knowing Quatre has engineered most of our bases in the past, along with his own companies buildings. He's a constructive genius of sorts. I forgot I was holding on my Trowa's shirt as he started to walk forward. I couldn't help not to stumble a bit as I took in the radical change of scenery. The walls and floor were a dark gray, hard metallic material, contrasting to the nature behind us. The ceiling began to shutter and drop suddenly, plunging us into total darkness. I watched Trowa take his phone out to use as a flashlight.

"Well, this is creepy..." I muttered. I wonder what would have happened if we were still standing back there? Not the time to think about pending doom... or is it?

We walked in silence as we followed to path through the underground. For some reason I feel like I'm a walking to my death, with only a glow from Trowa's cellphone to guide me to the end. How very morbid of me to think that. All in all, I guess that's the kind of mindset you need when going to battle, isn't it? However, thinking in terms like this brings me back to the days when I first met the other pilots. Especially Julie and Mayumi. We always got along so naturally, as if we knew each other from another lifetime. Heh. How completely different we are-

"How long do you think this tunnel is?" I hear Trowa, probably talking to himself. I quicken my steps to get closer to him and the light.

"Who knows... Quatre probably built this extra long for extra measures of safety." I say rather matter of factly. He was always the strategic one of the lot. I have a feeling these missions are going to show our true nature this time around. I cannot shake the feeling that we are all holding on to demons from the previous battles we fought in. I don't think we can keep holding them in. They are monsters, bitter monsters gnawing at the edges of our soul. I fear, yes, we could find despair if we keep pretending that they don't exist. I can't figure out which side of this is normal... for us that is. Are we all going insane, or have we never been sane in the first place?

"I think we're at the end." Trowa says with no emotion and I'm snapped out of my growing emotional moods. We had reached a door... how long were we walking for? Trowa glances back at me, hand on the doorknob. I give him a nod. We didn't need to say anything, we are prepared for what will come next.


	14. Chapter 14 : Steph, Sentimental

I place the phone gently into my lap. I cannot talk her out of coming it seems... I sigh and look up at Quatre. He has his head turned to look outside.

"What are those two doing?" He said with a light chuckle, shaking his head so his bangs fell in front of his face. I look out the window to see Duo carrying Julie over his shoulder as she flails her limps.

"They're always goofing around, those two." I say putting my hand over my lips as I giggle. Quatre then turns to me, his eyes slightly wild.

"Do they know about Mulan? Does _anyone_ else know?" He asks and I shake my head.

"No Quatre, no one knows about this. I am surprised she even told me, but I think the pain of keeping that secret was a little too much for her to handle." I give a slight sigh as I see Duo finally put Julie down when Rashid greets them outside, "We need to be careful."

"Careful?" Quatre gave me a questioning look, "Steph, we cannot allow this to continue on! She cannot put her child at risk with these missions... and who knows what her body has gone through already. She cannot push herself!"

"Quatre!" I hiss as the door opened and Duo's head popped in.

"Heeeey! Long time so see, guys! How ya doing?" He gave a big grin and slide in.

"Duo! It's great to see you!" He exclaimed and they gave each other a quick pat on the back as they embraced. Julie soon followed sliding into her seat.

"Hiya!" She said with a big smile, leaned over to give Quatre a quick hug and kiss on the cheek, before leaning over to me.

"Hi Julie! It's been too long!" I said hugging her tightly.

"You as well! You look good." She said as she leaned back into her seat. I smiled at them both. The aura those two bring is something spectacular. They simply glow with happiness. It makes me want to forget my troubles and enjoy the carefree life for a while.

"So how are you- man this is comfy- how have you guys been? You ride in style- champagne? Is this alcoholic? Moving up I see!" Duo asked as he settled into his seat, observing every little detail of the limo. A little too much stimulation, perhaps? Quatre laughed while Julie rolled her eyes a bit and gave a sassy look in my direction.

"I've been well, Duo... How about you? How was the re-opening of the Maxwell Church?" Quatre smiling coolly as he swiftly grabbed the bottle of champagne out of Duo's hand before he could open it.

"It was great, Quatre! It really was..." Duo looking a little upset that the alcohol was removed from his grasp, "I gotta hand it to ya, you really saved us a huge deal of trouble."

"We certainly would never have been able to do this without your help, Quatre. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you so much." Julie said with a big enthusiastic smile.

"Oh, it's nothing really. I know how much that church meant to you two in the past and I believe that that church can bring some happiness back to the people of L2." Quatre said putting a hand behind his head, being modest as always.

"It must have been emotional for you two..." I chimed in, seeing the look on both their faces as Quatre mentioned the past. It swept over their faces like a storm. Duo looks at Julie and grabbed her hand gently.

"Yeah, it sure was! We can say we brought the smiles back to the people! Always wanted to be able to say that..." He said with a big smile. His sadness had left his face, that or he was hiding it very well, "But, now we can think of the Maxwell Church as looking toward the future."

"They will never be forgotten." I said with a smile. I have to say, I do not know much about their past at the Maxwell Church. Rather, they never talk much about those times. I only know that that's where they got their names from, that and that it burned down and everyone was killed inside except them. I could see Julie was a little tense, but gave me a big smile.

"You're absolutely right, Steph. I do believe we have literally built more hope into that Colony. Even though we believe nothing in religion or church teachings, at least some will have a place to be at peace from the war... well... the new war that is." She nodded slowly as she spoke the last words.

"The innocent people who are affected by this war... those are the ones that we are fighting for. The fact that we can do something to stop the sadness in this world is important. This we must always remember." Quatre said with a serious look to all of us. He was so passionate in times like these. Sometimes I question whether he really should be a soldier in the first place. He'd be much better off as a preacher of peace. He is just too kind for bloodshed. I guess I shouldn't be talking. I should have never started fighting in the first place. My heart is far too weak or I am not a violent person in nature.

"Always the sentimental aren't ya, Quatre?" Duo laughed a bit and patted him on the shoulder, "You're right. We have a lot to fight for!" Julie looked over at me and smiled. Duo and Quatre share a strong bond. Julie and I, however, were never that close. Though I was never close to the other Gundam pilot girls. I believe I was too much of a pacifist to be able to handle most of what was going on in this war. It was senseless and I wasn't strong enough to handle it. What makes me think I am stronger enough this time around?

However, I am glad I have these people beside me. Sometimes it is good to have this many around you to support you when you fall.


	15. Chapter 15 : Mulan, Focus

Glancing outside, we seem to be hovering over desert territory... guessing by the lack of, well, anything in a close proximity. I subconsciously rub my stomach, wanting to caress it more, but I need to be as subtle as possible times like these. Wufei is by far a man to pay attention to detail, but if I act the bit out of his perception of me... He's staring at me.

"Yes, dear?" I calmly speak to him. He's giving me an intense gaze, though I'm not sure he's paying attention to where he's looking. His mind must be wild. A blood lust perhaps? He has been craving for battle since the day stopped fighting. He doesn't hate peace, he just simply despises a lack of competitive movement against an enemy. He's growing impatient and that makes his mind grow more and more agitated as time progresses. This hourglass of sand has run short a long time ago... how much longer is his composure going to last, I wonder.

I take a look back outside to the surface below us. It is sparkling and intriguing of sorts. Maybe I will knit a sparkly blanket for this new little one. Did I- Did I just think that? This _thing_ in my stomach, that feeling in the pit of my stomach is accompanying it. I haven't given thought to anything yet. My hesitation will lead me to a horrible end if I let this carry on. Carry on... What am I supposed to do at a time like this... this war. This horrible war! Why did have to come _now_. The sand in my hourglass is sliding through, and I don't have much time to dwell on faltered decisions.

I fear I may be getting emotional. That is rather unlike me... It must be this... this-

"Woman." I hear Wufei call my name in the mist of all my thoughts.

"Yes?" I half heartily answer. His eyes changed a bit as he refocused to reality.

"I believe in this fate the world has handed us." He lowers his head while still keeping his gaze upon me, "There is much we will need to sacrifice for our sense of justice to become dominate in this world. I want you to stay strong and not have your thoughts stray towards unimportant musings. We are meant to fight. Prepare your mind for what lies ahead." I only nodded toward him as he gazed outside, taking in the scenery as I was moments before.

He is right, but with the wrong intentions I fear. I have only this to believe in.

"Looks like we have arrived." I mumbles as the plane begins its descend.

What a fleeting holiday we had.


	16. Chapter 16 : Hiiro, Gathering

I walk toward the main control room, where the beeping from the front gate is going off... signaling someone is here. I walk in and check the many screens set up for our security system of this base. A fine system I might add. Quatre should be proud.

"Trowa and Shiris, huh?" I let the sound escape my lips as I press the button for the gate, "They'll figure it out soon enough." I watch the screen for a brief moment as the gate begins to open and they begin to walk inside. I push the button for the garage, and I watch their car smoothly slide into a section that rises up from the ground. I hit close and head out of the room. I see Mayumi in the hallway with her head down, pondering something it seems...

"Mayumi..." She looks up at me, "Go fix up the laboratory." I say in a rather demanding voice, I guess that's my way of nature. She nods, not bothering to look at me, and walks away down the hall. She seems to be over thinking to a degree recently. Ever since we received the news from Jane about the new missions, she's been a bit uneasy. I watch her figure for a moment, finding it rather intriguing, before I take a few more steps into the briefing room. All ten manila folders were placed neatly at the center of the table. Might as well let the others figure out where they so desire to place themselves, right? Somehow, we always seem to go by our code numbers.

This mission is by far the most dangerous we have had to tackle in the past. Chance of survival is close to null, as Jane had given up those statics. '_Only you can change those odds with your own skill and knowledge._' I hear her voice ringing in my ears. Our new titles as Preventers give us much more responsibility than when we were Gundam Pilots. As Pilots, we fought for the freedom of the colonies. We had a great deal of weight to bear on our shoulders, especially when the colonies turned on us. Now as Preventers, we've kept that weight on our shoulders along with the task of preventing evil from spreading through the nations. However, it must be done. Who better than us to defend this world? Most of us don't have much to lose in the long run. Might as well fight while we can.

We now have something to fight for, something to protect, and most importantly, a reason to live. The only thing on my mind is this: I will survive.

I heard the door on the other end of the briefing room click and it slowly opened revealing the first two arrivals. I proceed to walk toward the door as the figures enter.

"Hiiro." Trowa voice broke the silent as I reached forward and grabbed his hand firmly; giving it a good shake.

"Trowa." I give a stern response. I find myself feeling more pleased now that Trowa is here. We have an unusual relationship, where words are not needed to convey what is in need to be heard. Words are irrelevant in that kind of nature. I then turn to Shiris, reaching forward and gave her a solid handshake. She smiled genuinely at me.

"Hi, Hiiro. It's been a while." I nod in agreement and let go of her hand.

"Are we the first ones to arrive?" Trowa asked as I extend my arm outward, clueing them in to take a look around.

"Yes, you are. Have a look around, since this will be your headquarters for as long as needed. The room in front of you is the briefing room and behind is the kitchen. The hallway to your right is the entrance way to the sleeping quarters, while the hallway on your left is the entrance to security facilities, laboratories, weapons and gadgets holding, locker rooms and so on." I say while grazing the room with my arm.

"It's more spacious than I thought it would be!" Shiris exclaimed in a content tone, "We won't be down each other's throats all the time."

"We will see once everyone is here..." Trowa said in dry humor.

"Agreed." I nod. I can only imagine throwing in people like Duo and Wufei into the mix of closed quarters such as these. I'm sure the air will be tense once we all settle in. It's been a while since we've all been together. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Mayumi walk in with a smile on her face.

"Shiris. Trowa. Good to see you two!" She said more enthusiastically than I would have predicted. I watch as she comes over and hugs Shiris and puts a hand on Trowa's shoulder. From the looks at it, seeing these two broke her out of her 'Jane funk'. Her previous conversation had her rather unsettled. She needs to bring herself together before the brief.

"Did you find the place okay?" She asked and Shiris rolled her eyes.

"Well, there wasn't much of a place to find!" She said with a smile.

"Yeah, Quatre sure knows how to make them, doesn't he?" Trowa said shaking his head in amusement.

"He sure does!" Mayumi nodded.

"You can go put your things in your sleep quarters if you'd like." Abruptly breaking up the chitchat as I hear the security room buzzing a sound, signaling another arrival. The two of them nodded and head off to do so.

"It's going to get quite vivacious isn't it?" Mayumi turned to me, giving me a smug look. I place my hand on her shoulder for a moment before answering.

"We are all pretty lively after all." I say in my usual monotone, with a smidge of dry humor. She chuckles and shakes her head.

"I'm not sure what your definition of lively is…" She says with a smile as she walks away toward the security room. I lean myself against the back of one of the seats and sigh.

Lively… indeed. You cannot predict what will happen when all of us gather. Bumping heads is one thing, but we are all fiercely willed, strong-minded and stubborn people; even the most laid back of the bunch will jump down someone's throat given the opportunity or if they have been wronged in some way, shape, or form. It's all comparative in the end. If we haven't killed each other in the past… I doubt, even with our skills, that it's possible.


	17. Chapter 17 : Duo, Gathering

"Thanks a lot, Rashid! We owe ya one!" I call out and wave frantically as the limo pulls away. I pull my sack over my shoulder and look at Quatre, "Where to now?" Seeing as we are in the middle of a desert… Assuming our base is underground. At least that's how the last Maganac Corps base was set up.

"We wait until someone lets us in." Quatre said with a chuckle, "There's no way to open it from outside."

"Always the desert, huh Quatre?" Julie chimed in as she danced and twirled around in a circle, killing time. Her spirits much be lifted since on L2. I haven't seen her dance in a while come to think of it. She dances so gracefully that I could just get mesmerized in her twirly-whirly so called insert random shitty metaphor I can`t think of at this moment! It`s not like I should be thinking in terms like that anyway. Rather I should just-

"You know me, I try to plan a base in a secure location. I guess the desert seems to be my way of staying close to home." Quatre said scratching his head. Suddenly the ground rumbled and part of the ground began to rise.

"Underground it is!" I exclaim, as if I had solved a mystery.

"Naturally!" Quatre says as he lifts up his belongings and heads down the dark tunnel, followed by Steph. Julie gracefully twirled past me, blowing me a kiss as she glided by. My feet betray me and I stall for a moment. Well, once again the God of Death, huh? I can't seem to get rid of this title, can I? At least I was able to become some sort of holy helper by resurrecting the Maxwell Church. Who am I kidding; the real angel in this equation is Julie. She's the one who came up with the idea in the first place. She's definitely got some Peacecraft blood in here, that's for sure... Naturally I agreed, I'm a sucker for her after all…

I took to a light run after the rest of the group, and casually wrapping my arm around Julie's shoulder.

"I wonder what our next mission will be like." I think out loud, "I hope I still remember how to hack through systems... I'm outta practice here!"

"Oh…You don't need to worry about that, Duo. I was always the better hacker anyway!" Julie said teasing me. I mockingly laugh as I turn to look at her while gripping her shoulder firmly. She just wrinkled her nose at me like usual. She needs to stop being so sweet, or these missions will be utter suicide trying to stay focused. Glad I brought my drugs with me; keep me sane enough to concentrate.

"I wonder that as well, Duo. Surely, it will be some sort of espionage mission to start off with right?" Quatre stated as he whipped out his cellphone once the gate behind us shut tightly.

"Yeah, we need to gather information about _someone_ right?" Steph added looking down at the ground. Oh Steph... She seems to not want to be here. What. So. Ever. She looks incredibly tense and even _I _can sense the hesitation she has with each step she takes. Silence fell as we kept walking through the dim lit darkness.

"There's the door!" Quatre exclaimed after several moments and I heard a sigh of relief from Steph. I could feel tense up but she expressed herself with excitement with a tiny giggle.

"I can't wait to see everyone!" She exclaimed happily as Quatre opened the door and went inside. I held the door open for Steph and Julie to walk through and then went in myself. As I walk in Hiiro is greeting Quatre and Steph. I heard Julie give a slight gleeful sound as skips up to Hiiro and gave him a tight hug, to my surprise, Hiiro returned with the same amount of embrace. I walked over to him.

"Well, well, if it isn't the great Hiiro Yui... Long time no see!" I say as I shake his hand firmly.

"Greatness goes both ways, Duo." Hiiro replied back with a hint of a smile. I then pull him in for a good strong embrace.

"I missed ya buddy." I say to him and he replies with his typical 'hn'. Though we have our severe differences in personality, I know our friendship will last forever. We've been through enough together as it is, you know. He's a companion that I could always rely on... except for when he punched me and left me to be captured back in AC196, he _could_ have at least told me in better detail what he was planning to do... _but_ I don't hold a grudge!

"Trowa and Shiris are here as well." Hiiro said with a nod and Julie's facial expressions got very excited in a matter of seconds.

"Aa! Where? _Where_? Tell me now!" Julie bounces up and down as Hiiro points to the hallway on the right and she takes off down the hallway screaming, '_Shiris_! _Oh, Shiris_! _I know you're here_!' to which a faint. '_Julie_?' followed in response before what sounded like a tackle to the floor of some kind occurring… '_OUCH_!' could be heard from two people muffled a slight scream and concluding in a fit of laughter.

Mayumi came walking in from the opposite end of the room, "What was that noise?" She asked giving Quatre and Steph hugs before turning to me. I gave her a good one-arm shoulder hug.

"That's Julie, naturally, you just missed her!" I exclaimed winking at her.

"The sleeping quarters are down that hallway, everything else on the opposite end." Hiiro monotone voice stated as he nudge toward the right and left. It's as if he had already explained himself and refused to repeat any more detailed information… Yeah, that sounds about right.

"I'll show you where it is!" Mayumi said motioning to Quatre and Steph to follow her. Quatre nods and nods to Steph as he grabs his bag. Hiiro then turns to me but doesn't say anything. What a conversation starter, eh?

"So… Still the lean, mean, spandex machine I see!" I joke around giving a light chuckle as I fold my arms. Hiiro, however, did not seem too amused. I can even _hear_ him saying 'Duo… I'm not wearing spandex…' Yup, yup, yup…

"Did you tell her?" he questioned; right down to business as always. I stopped laughing and gave him a stern look.

"Look, Hiiro. I wouldn't tell Julie anything regarding you unless I found it necessary to do so." I gave a big sigh, "Hiiro, this is some serious stuff, man. You need to be careful. Another wrong move and you'll be thrown in jail! Plus, we do _not_ want these kind of people after us, especially while we're trying to complete our missions…"

"I know, Duo. That entirely aside, I did what had to be done. There was no way around a matter such as this. I am good at what I do, no information was leaked." Hiiro had a glint in his eyes that I rarely see. I gotta hand it to him, he knows what he's doing, but…

"Hiiro, this is _Firefight_ you're talking about. This is no ordinary rebel group we're dealing with here. I've done my research, these guys look like they have some sort of connection with the White Fang..." I say shaking my head. I won't say out loud that I'm a bit uneasy, but I can sure think that, can't I? Who _knows_ what kind of stuff these guys can pull off when we're giving our attention to the mission at hand. Let's just say 'deadly', is an understatement. Hiiro placed a hand on my shoulder firmly.

"I will handle whatever comes our way." He said with a bit of an undertone in his voice. I nod, only as a confirmation of hearing him. I'm not so sure we're even suppose to lay our cards on the table in the way Hiiro had laid his. He knows by now that it's not just his hand he lays on the line. It certainly takes things into a different perspective when it's just him, but I can tell he's reminded that's not the case when he's around us. I think that's why he wasted no time in bringing up that topic. It's clearly on his mind.

"I've got your back buddy, you know that." I say with a smile, clasping my hand on his shoulder. He gives me a solid nod. Whether or not Hiiro has gotten himself into a messy heap, we won't actually know until someone attacks our ranks. Which, again, leaves me uneasy. For now I can only take in being around this group for what it is. You know, get some good concrete moments of togetherness before we set off again.

I must admit, there sure is nothing like the feeling of coming home to your best friends...


	18. Chapter 18 : Trowa, Around Base

"Clearly _these_ are couple suites aren't they?" Shiris said with a bit of a laugh as we walked down the hall. Five rooms, naturally labeled in consecutive order from one to five, lined the hallway.

"Well, here's zero three." I said as I opened the door, revealing a massive room with two beds on each side. Accompanied with side tables and places to put clothes.

"Oh good, there's two beds! I mean, not that one bed would be a bad thing! We do have missions to concentrate on, however. One bed would have been fantastic, I wouldn't mind. I'm surprised there are two beds actually. I- I mean not fantastic per say, I'd be absolutely fine sharing a bed with you is what I meant by that. Just well… oh dear…" Shiris kept retracting and beginning her sentence over and over again, blushing more and more each time she stumbled. She's cute when she rambles. I grab her chin and kiss her lips lightly before I throw my bag on the floor.

"We can deal with that later." I say and smile as she gives me a sweet smile back accompanied by her rosy cheeks. I take a few steps into the room and take a look around. It was a fairly decently sized room for two people, to be fair. Who knows how long we'll actually be staying in these corridors.

I remember a time when it was not very hard to separate myself from peaceful reality and being a soldier. Maybe because I had nothing to live for in the long run, so it didn't matter whether I lived or died. Clearly, times are different from back then. People grow older and wiser, with the passage of time, but the unsettling thing is the hesitation that seems to linger from the previous war. Hesitation regarding what type of mindset I am supposed to approach battling with. This is the first war all of us are fighting more like a family than mere allies. We, on a personal level, have much more to lose this time around. I hope I can find the right set of mind.

Shiris took a few steps into the room as well, dropping her bag to the floor.

"I guess the shower room must be down the hall." She said looking around the room.

"Shiris! Oh, Shiris! I know you're here!" A voice comes from the hallway. I raise an eyebrow at Shiris as she turns to step back into the hallway.

"Julie?" Shiris questions, reaching the hallway, and not a moment later Julie slams into her, which they both fall to a heap on the ground. I'm sure the look on my face was sheer surprise as I watched those few moments occur. Talk about a greeting…

"_OUCH_!" They both cry simultaneously. They both look at each and then burst out laughing as Julie tackles her with some serious hugging abilities.

"Shiris! Oh, Shiris! How I've missed you so!" Julie said with great joy, laughing and rocking her friend back and forth. Shiris patted her on the back lightly.

"A ha ha, I've missed you too, Julie! Now can you _please_ get off me?" Shiris said calmly while laughing and smiling at her.

"Ehe, sorry!" Julie said as she began to stand up, pulling Shiris up as well. She clasps both hands on each of Shiris's arms, giving her a big smile, before turning to me.

"Hi Julie." I say as I walk toward her. She certainly hasn't lost her personality.

"Trowa! It's been too long!" She said and we embraced for a moment. I almost forgot how energetic she is. _Almost_.

"It's so good to see you guys! You'll have to tell me all about your lives!" Julie said as she let go of me and looked back and forth between the two us, probably taking it all in, "and the circus! It's been so long since I've seen you perform!" She said with a cheerful grin.

"Same goes for you! I need to hear more about this new Maxwell Church!" Shiris said with a big smile.

"Man, I wish we had more time to settle in to this pla-," Julie stops in mid sentence and looks around the room, "I- What? Wait a minute… Why are there two beds?" She gives us both a quite look of disgust before looking back at the room, "Well that's just stupid…" She said the last part in a low tone of voice.

"Subtle, aren't you Julie?" Shiris said and they both laughed.

"_Just_ saying!" She said, "I will be rearranging a few things the moment I set foot into my room! How _exciting_ this all is!" What a dramatic use of words on her part.

"Julie! I could hear you from the other end of the base!" A voice called from down the hallway.

"Mayumi!" Julie squealed and she ran up to her give her a great big hug. It looks as if-

"Julie… too tight, can't… breathe..." Mayumi's voice barely escaped her lungs. Yeah, I was right. She was ready to crush her from excitement. Somehow the picture of a hyper dog seeing its master come home seemingly pops into my head. Hm. I just thought of Julie as a hyper dog in my mind. That… is bizarre. Yes.

"You know you missed me, don't lie to me!" Julie said tighter, before letting go. Quatre and Steph moved passed them to greet us. Steph greeted Shiris with a hug and Quatre embraced me.

"Trowa! Trowa! It's so good to see you…" Quatre said in a gentle joyful voice. It is nice to be in the presence of Quatre's pure kindness again. When I remember back to when I first met him, he seemed so naive and out of place... He certainly has grown since then. It's nice to see the mysterious changes that happen within one's companions over time.

"You too, Quatre." I said as he lets go and I place my hand on his shoulder. He smiled widely at me, before turning to Shiris and greeting her with a hug. Steph came up to me and hugged me and I patted her lightly on the back.

"So these are what the rooms look like?" Quatre said curiously as he peeked behind my shoulder, "I guess we might as well put our things in ours then!" He said walking over to the one labeled zero four, Steph behind his heels. I look at Shiris for a moment, giving her a smile, as Mayumi and Julie walk up to Shiris. Julie grabbed on to both of their hands tightly.

"I'm glad we're together again, even though the reasons aren't so good." Julie said with a sad smile, "We just can't stay away from missions can we?" She laughed a bit as the Shiris and Mayumi smiled at her.

It is quite a sight when you witness such moments of true friendship. It's something unexplainable and not comprehendible to others. It's like a never ending inside joke in a way. No matter how different, each of our auras seems to be so connected to one another.

"Well might as well stop crowding the hallway." I say dryly but with a smile. The girls nod as Quatre and Steph return from their room.

"Oh! I forgot my bag anyway! Too much excitement! " Julie laughed, rubbing the back of her head. All of us walked back into the briefing room. Duo walked over and greeted Shiris and myself with a warm 'Duo' embrace.

"Good to see you two as always!" Duo said with a wide smile before Julie started tugging at his hand.

"Come on! We have to check out the room!" She said, pulling at her arm.

"My pleasure!" Duo said with a smirk and grabbed the two sacks on the floor before being pulled down the hallway by Julie.

"Those two are like children..." Hiiro droned. I cannot help but chuckle to myself.

The memories we have of our friends, whether they change over time or not, still have a lingering effect it seems... With the passage of time, each day is a new beginning with our old memories still set into place. I can feel the presence still lingering in my mind. Those bitter comings from the past. Everything affects what I do now and it is only a matter of time until it shatters my view of what is reality... However, I have the means to change all of this if I wish to do so. Nothing is finite except death. As Gundam pilots, and now as preventers, our worlds have collided and it's up to us to use what knowledge we have gained toward our perception of the future. Our time... is now. I believe us as a team can accomplish anything if we are all perfect. Though, as it is presently, I fear we may not be capable of such perfection.


	19. Chapter 19 : Quatre, Until Tomorrow

I watched as Julie and Duo bustled their way down the hallway and to their room. It was nice to see Julie in such high moods of such... considering what I had witnessed the last time I was on L2. She looked too much of a wreck. Duo was stressed and emotionally beat down from the church rebuilding as it was and I fear that toll on Julie was something of another kind. I tried to help her out in the only way I knew how, with what I gave her that is, but whether that was enough... I am uncertain. I am loyal to my friends, and I'd do anything for them after all.

I suddenly felt Steph's hand place on my shoulder gently. I turned to her and she was looking at the ground. I watched her carefully as her face became sterner with concentration on her part. I know she was fighting whether or not to mention something to me, since she kept doing a sort of sigh ever so often that sounded like she would start talking but nothing came out of her mouth. I waited patiently for the moment, since with her; you had to wait to get what you wanted out of her. It was the best wait in the world, for her gentler words were worth it. However, she only looked at me and smiled sweetly. I placed my hand on her back and rubbed it gently. I had planned to ask her more about what was troubling her, though I found myself unable to expression such concern through words to her.

"Once Wufei and Mulan are here, we'll get straight to the briefing. We have a lot of parameters to cover." Hiiro said in a stern tone, which is natural for him to do so, but I believe his tone wasn't meant for us.

"I- I can make some tea while we wait!" Steph chimed in suddenly. Clearly her nerves were on the higher end as she fiddled with her hands a bit. She is lovely, really truly is. I wish I could say that more to her. She deserves to be in a peaceful world and I know it is torture for her.

"Sure, Steph. That would be great." Shiris said with a smile. Once Steph turned around and made her way to the kitchen, Shiris's eyes glanced at me. I nodded slowly torward here, since I knew what she was thinking. I had pushed it in the back of my mind, but those thoughts are coming to the surface. Can Steph handle this? That phrase will be ringing in my head from now on. I do not want this to cause hesitation on my part during the missions, but I cannot help but have my mind drift towards that idea.

I listened patiently as Mayumi and Shiris talked a bit about what they've been doing over the past year, but with a heavy heart all I could was sigh. Trowa turned to face me.

"Are you alright, Quatre?" His eyes were staring at me, almost as if he wanted to get inside my brain without the use of spoken words.

"Oh, I'm alright, Trowa!" I said with a beam, then my voice got lower, "Just... my nerves are higher since Steph's are through the roof..." Trowa nodded.

"I understand." He said glancing over at Steph, then back to me, "Quatre, I'm sure you are the only one that has the power to comfort her in her times of worries. She will believe your words if you let them reach her." I nodded a Trowa's words for a moment, taking them in. It is true though; after anyone she'd be listening to what I had to say first. Even so, I tried talking to her more about the subject before we left, but she seemed shut off on the matter. I guess I need to try harder.

"Yeah, Trowa, you are right. Thank you." I said with a smile and patting him on the shoulder. Trowa certainly has a way with words. When he speaks, it's always about something important. I always admired that about him.

"What is taking them so long?" I heard Mayumi mutter at Shiris, who gave her a shrug in reply. I assumed they were talking about Julie and Duo.

"They must be testing out their new beds!" I say unconsciously out loud and a burst of snickers and Mayumi slamming her head into her palm made me realize I had said something while unaware of its alternative meaning. Trowa looked at me wide eyed for a moment. A phrase like that coming from me? That's more along the lines of Duo's field of work. I sigh and mutter out what must have been a 'Sorry' but it came out more like a mixture of sounds. Steph came over holding a tray of tea for all of us and placed it on the table.

A series of beeping came from around the corner and Hiiro muttered something inaudible before walking over to the source of the sound.

"Looks like our last arrivals are here." Mayumi said with a stoic nod and she followed Hiiro down the hallway. Shiris smiled, but her eyes expressed her to be thinking to herself. I believe Shiris to be the quiet type like Trowa, but her difference in personality set her off to be much more seemingly open. _Seemingly_, is the keyword here. I am not one to pry into my fellow pilots lives, but being as those two are so guarded all the time... I wonder if they'll ever crack under the pressure and be more honest about their feelings. We must all be like that an extent. However, it's their nature to stay, on the surface, calm under any pressure. I shouldn't pry...

Instead, I should be doing the same as them, to be honest. I should be mentally preparing myself for the mission we will be setting off to do. I still have the lingering feeling in back of my mind about Steph, but I do need to focus.

I could feel the air in the room growing denser as silence started to seep in. I used to try to prepare myself for death back then, but I was unable to do so. I believed back out of my comrades, I was the only one unable to do so. Was it a matter of being lucky enough to survive, or did I have the skill and strategy to defy such an inevitable end. Facing these new missions with the same mindset might do me some good... but we will see.


	20. Chapter 20 : Wufei, Together Again

I take my first steps off the plane and into the sandy ground, considerably throwing my sack on the ground. Clearly this is the location given to us... and there is nothing here. I feel _very_ irritated. Mulan steps off the plane as well, holding on to luggage tightly. She places a hand on my shoulder.

"Be patient." She says softly as the plane starts up its engine and abruptly takes off in a puff of clouded sand. My thoughts must be written all over my stern expression as she rubs my tense shoulder. I tried to relax, but the tension remained as we felt a rumble underneath us. The earth in front of us began to part and lift, showing an entrance way to a tunnel. I picked up my bag and the both of us walked silently down the corridor. The gate behind us began to shut and plunged us both into total darkness.

"Fuck." I mutter as I try to pull my phone out of my pocket, but Mulan had beaten me to the action as a dim light glowed in front of me. I groaned, a sound of thank you, as we kept walking.

I feel it underneath my skin. That same crawling in my skin. That same boiling of my blood. That same sensation that drives me to fight every day. I cannot pretend it is not there. I can only shape its rage into a form of calmness for a period of time. Now that we have arrived, this will create a ripple effect in my senses.

After sometime of walking, we reach a door and I grab the doorknob firmly. Nothing can get in my way of this justice. I will triumph over the enemy presented to me...

I open the door to see Hiiro, Mayumi, Quatre, Trowa, Shiris and Steph standing around a large table in the middle of a room.

"Hmph." Is all I muster as they all turn to me, "Looks more like a party instead of a meeting." I say with a hint of aggression as Hiiro comes over to me and shakes my hand. I grip his firmly, not saying anything. Steph had walked over to Mulan and hugged her.

"Hi Wufei! Good to see you again!" Quatre said enthusiastically and shook my hand.

"You too." I nod. Trowa reached out his hand as well.

"Wufei."

"Trowa." I nod, not needing much other conversation. I turn and nod at the women and they wave back at me. Acknowledgement is all they need after all.

"You're the last one." Hiiro muttered.

"Oh?" I question, not seeing a certain braided nuisance in my presence. Speaking of, the two loud mouths appear from the hallway to the right. Julie beamed and ran over to Mulan, giving her a hug. Some sort of giggling and awkward women sounds followed, which I had no reason to give my attention to any further. Duo greeted Mulan and kissed her on the cheek before walking over to me.

"Heey, Wufei! How are ya?" Duo said with a grin and gave me what he likes to call his 'brother hug'. I recognized the gesture, considering last time when he opted to trying to do said motion; I punched him in the stomach. Though, this time I will allow such low gestures of friendship to occur. Have I become softer? Weak.

"Duo." I say as we pat each other on the back.

"Well would you look at us?" Duo said with a big grin looking around the room, "The gangs all back together!" He was rather cheerful for such a dire reason to be gathered. That is his way of hiding his true feelings regarding our situation. I find that to be weak, while others find that be courageous and they acknowledge such character. Regardless, he can do whatever he deems necessary as long as he gets his work done; I do not have a problem with it.

Hiiro looked at his wrist, "Well, I must insist that we get started with the briefing. Wufei and Mulan you can put your things in your room down the hall."

I give him a nod and Mulan and I go down the hall. We stop in front of the room marked zero five. I open the door and throw both of our bags on the floor before shutting it abruptly. Mulan is staring at me. I'm unsure whether she is trying to scold me with her eyes or if she is thinking about something important. I caress her face gently with my hand and her eyes soften. I would never show such affectionate actions in front of anyone else, for some reason she seemed to need it. I cannot let myself linger in such actions of softness however and I start to walk away. She grabs my arm gently.

"What?" I say unsympathetically. She instantly drops her hand, as if my words touched her like hot iron.

"N- nothing, we can't keep everyone waiting." She said looking at the floor. What is wrong with this woman?

"No hesitations, Mulan. This is crucial." I say staring at her. She then walks past me and down the hallway into the other room. I stare at where she was for a moment.

"...Women..." I mutter and follow in suit.

"Let's get this briefing started, shall we?" I hear Hiiro say as I walk into the room. The rest are bustling around to their chairs. Hiiro is standing at the front of the long table, while Mayumi takes a seat to his left. The rest follow suit, guys sitting on one side of the table while the girls on the other side facing them. I take my seat at the other end of the table from Hiiro, across from Mulan. There is a manila folder in front of me with only 'Confidential' in black letterings across it. I look up at Hiiro to see he is standing in a stoic way waiting for everyone to settle down.

"Now... Our mission..."


	21. Chapter 21: Mayumi, The Mission

I glanced up at Hiiro as he looked out at our fellow comrades. Rare bright eyes accompanied his stern looking face. His jaw loosened as he began once again.

"Peace has not lasted as long as we had all hoped. We stopped Operation Meteor in the hopes of stopping a war." I looked around the table to see a few sad smiles form on my friends. Julie, sitting next to me, was looking at me with sad eyes. I put a hand on her shoulder before looking back to Hiiro.

"Our fighting is not over and Jane has provided us with the necessary information for our new mission..." He took a deep breath before continuing, "Even thought the scientists are gone, we have new information that a group has gotten a hold of top secret workings under the project Operation A.M. or Operation Absolute Magnitude. How they obtained these files is uncertain. This original Operation was to build a powerful beam cannon and use it to destroy the earth." He then paused and looked at me.

"The name relates to the measuring of a heavenly object's brightness when viewed from 32+ light years." I chime in as I read the paper in front of me I had pulled out of the manila folder, "Believing this beam cannon will cause a massive brightness that can be seen from anywhere in galaxy." Hiiro nodded and then continued.

"A rebel group named 'New Order Crusade' or N.O.C. who are claiming to be the secret faction of OZ`s elite private force, personally trained by Treize himself, have been identified as the main focus of power. This group did not surface when Dekim was rising into power because of the Barton foundation influence, which they were not too fond of. Intelligence has supplied us information that N.O.C. has taken previous stated Operation A.M. plans and reprised them to do its workings against the colonies." He gave a cough as some of the team members gave glancing looks at each other.

"They are directly targeting all L colonies. Yes… L1, L2, L3, and L4 specifically." Hiiro paused as several people out cried in anger. I glanced down the table at everyone's expressions. Julie, Shiris, and Mulan had the same gapping expression, followed by several versions of 'what?' and 'I can't believe it'. Duo had slammed his fist on the table and was visibly angry. Quatre had leaned forward with a disbelieving look on his face, while Steph had a bleak expression on her own. Trowa had his eyes narrowed and had his hand on his chin. Wufei sat motionless with his arms crossed over his chest and his eyes closed.

"How could this be possible? How is anyone letting this happen?" Quatre was the first one to speak after the outcry.

"There are still many people who hate the colonies. They are rebels after all." Hiiro answered in a flat way.

I hung my head low. When Jane had told Hiiro and I this news, we had the same type of reaction. How could anyone have let this happen, after all we had been through? Who in their right mind would want to proceed with a plan such as this, after seeing Operation Meteor fall?

"But who would believe in such manipulation? Hasn't anyone learned anything from the last war?" Duo said as he leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms.

"Anyone will believe manipulation if it is worded correctly and presented by a person of great character and power." Trowa said with a nod. Duo made an irritated sort of noise.

"Then clearly a reality of peace isn't possible if people are so easily manipulated." Duo said with a heavy sigh.

"We were no different…" Julie mumbled under her breath.

"How have we never heard of this group?" Shiris questioned, "They were a part of OZ correct? How are there no records of such a group existing prior to this?"

"I believe we have Treize to thank you for that…" Hiiro said wryly, "Many of the members in the OZ faction never learned of such a supreme group within their ranks. Treize was very good at what he did and surely he kept many things under wraps within his own organization. He was an intelligent man in spite of everything"

"I can't believe Treize still keeps coming back to haunt our existence." Mulan said, I'm assuming to Wufei, since it was in quite a low tone.

"How did Jane obtain this information in the first place? Usually _we_ do the information gathering." Julie asked waving her hands as she talked.

"It has been confirmed on many levels and through many sources. Your brother, Julie, is one of the top sources for information that we currently have. Zechs is working undercover in this organization. Which, up until now, he was restricted from telling you about this if you two were to ever be in contact." Hiiro said looking straight at Julie. As I watched Julie's face I could tell she was fighting back a couple different emotions before settling on a twisted smile.

"Figures he'd be doing something like that behind my back!" Julie said raising her hands up in a defeated position. Clearly she was more upset about this than she was letting on, but her nature is to hide those feelings expertly, so no one pressed on the matter.

"What are our objectives?" Wufei called out from the end of the table, breaking his silence.

I began to open my manila folder and watched as everyone did the same, "Our mission is to retrieve data on primary weapons and retrieve more information about the N.O.C. and their plans for further actions." I bit my lip slightly, trying to keep myself from shouting an obscenity at the nature of how deadly this mission was… but I held my tongue. No need to set others into a panic.

"Location will be in a casino hotel, of the coast of South Africa, named Cadman Royale Casino which is allegedly near the N.O.C. headquarters," Hiiro said as the rest read through their mission briefing statements, "Some of their leaders are currently staying at the hotel before they plan to move to the middle east to begin construction work on the weapon, no confirmation on this has been found however. As information has provided, the members of the N.O.C. are always high rollers, they use fake money to gamble, but make a profit naturally when they win. Therefore, they are constantly in the casino to win money for the purpose of financing their plans."

"Smart Idea." Duo said as he thumbed through the statement, "Counterfeit kings and math-letes we are dealing with here?"

"If they were trained by Treize, we should expect excellent hand to hand combat and superb weapon handling, yes?" Shiris followed.

"Correct." Hiiro said before I spoke.

"Our objective for this mission is infiltration and retrieve data on war tactics at the Cadman Royale Casino hotel. The leader's hotel rooms hold their private laptops where information is supposedly stored." I say glancing at Julie before I look up at Hiiro.

"Mayumi and I will be infiltrating throughout the casino. Our job is to make sure pathways are secure and no trouble is caused." Hiiro nodded at me before continuing, "Duo and Julie, you two will be hacking the system, allowing for a secure line for communication and disabling security cameras and the like. Furthermore, once we infiltrate, you both have the job of hacking and downloading the appropriate data. You will stage as gamblers in the casino until you are needed in the parameters."

"Alright!" Duo said dragging out his last vowel as him and Julie high fived. I only shook my head but couldn't help a smile as I noticed Hiiro's expression.

"We get to have some fun!"

"Sounds like a pretty sweet deal!"

"Gambling with Jane's money? Hell yes!" Julie said with a big grin. Once they settled down and turned back to Hiiro, he was glaring daggers at them. They silently giggled to themselves, giving him a smart salute, as he cleared his throat and continued.

"Trowa and Shiris, naturally you will be in disguise, mainly working as dealers at the tables the N.O.C. usually engage themselves in and keep them occupied. Furthermore, you are to listen to their conversations carefully in case of any information leakage."

"Understood." They both said in unison with a nod. Julie turned and mouthed a silent 'awe' at me to which I proceeded to roll my eyes and lightly smack her arm with the back of my hand.

"Quatre, you will be posing as the pit boss and be the main look out for the team. We will need your strategic guidance on motions forward, given that you will be the eyes of the casino and have access to the security system. If needed, you will help disable security cameras." Hiiro said with a nod.

"Right." Quatre stated firmly as Hiiro turned to Steph.

"Steph, you will be a hostess and waitress for the high roller tables, keeping an eye on the surrounding areas on the floor. Looking out for any dangerous situations is a key point." Hiiro said and Steph nodded.

"Wufei and Mulan, you will pose as high rollers from China. Befriending the N.O.C. leaders is a plus and convincing them to stay longer in their games is crucial." Hiiro said which got him a grunt of acknowledgement from Wufei and a nod from Mulan. I saw Duo lean over to Trowa and ask something along the lines of 'Why would he give that job to Wufei?' and silently laughed as Trowa blinked a few times. Julie looked from Shiris and then to myself, probably thinking the same thing. Hiiro was staring at Duo because he was not being particularly quiet about his questioning. Duo shrugged innocently as Hiiro cleared his throat again.

"Those are the details of this mission. We leave at 1600 sharp-"

"But before that," I said cutting off Hiiro abruptly, which he awarded me with a glare, "Jane has requested every pilot take a physical, have blood work done, and questioned about his or her activities from the past year before your departure." I was expecting uproar of epic proportions but my statement was followed by silence. I look up to see everyone staring at me.

"I'm sorry…" Julie finally broke the silence after a few moments, "but what?" I glanced at Hiiro before I cleared my throat and began again.

"Jane has requested every pil-"

"No, no, no, I heard you." Julie said waving her hand, "I mean, why?" she had an odd tone in her words. I couldn't quite put my finger on it. It wasn't abrasive but…

"Those are Jane's orders." I state with the same monotone Hiiro would use, "We are expected to follow them." Julie leaned back in her chair as Shiris leaned forward.

"I think what Julie means to say is why is this necessary? We never had to do anything like this before." Shiris asked in a polite manner, seeing Hiiro's expression was growing a bit agitated.

"Those are the orders and we should follow them. End of story." Wufei spoke out, "Let's get this over with." There were some wry looks around the table as Hiiro began again.

"Right, Mayumi will take the women and then I will take the men. I see everyone has their BICs on, which is handy, seeing that has taken needed blood samples, brain waves, and physical attributes already." Hiiro said pointing to his wrist. I looked down at mine. Hiiro never told me _that_ aspect of them. From the looks of it, he didn't tell anyone else that either.

"Well…" I began as I stood up, "If all the ladies could follow me…" Julie's facial expression showed her emotions fairly openly her eyes got wide with what looked like a bit of fear. Shiris stood up as normal and Steph wryly followed. Mulan looked horrified for a moment before getting up slowly.

The girls followed me into the lab room down the left hallway. I opened the door, allowing everyone else to walk through first, and then shut it firmly. I watched for a moment as Julie rocked on her heels back and forth before turning around to face me. I stuck out my palm and looked her dead in the eyes.

"You first Julie. Your chip." I demanded. I searched her eyes for a moment as she stood in front of me in hesitation. I am assuming she had something to hide, otherwise she wouldn't be blatantly showing this type of indecision in her motions.

I do not expect them to be as perfect as I am seemingly supposed to be on the surface. I may find out information that I frankly would rather not be a part of…


	22. Chapter 22: Julie, The Truth

Her words seemed extra icy to me, though I might have been interpreting them as such, as I slowly reached my hand out and placed my chip on her palm. BICs, eh? Didn't know they were called that. What's the 'B' stand for… or for that matter the 'C'? Clearly the 'I' stands for 'in' right? I must not have the patience to go through the dictionary in my head trying to think of another word… 'Injury'? 'Intelligence' maybe? I could feel my heartbeat push against my chest, it's beat deafening my ears. I can't see straight. Brain, _focus_! On to more pressing issues! Fuck! Seriously, Fuck! What am I going to do? I knew I shouldn't have put that thing on! Can I panic yet? This is insane! How could Jane do this to me? I mean, clearly this must be strictly against me… well, no. That's a rash thing to think, but, but… but! I am _so_ frustrated. I really have to plan out what I'm going to say now. After my mini brain explosion, I watched as Mayumi slowly closed her palm.

"Thank you." She said dryly and heads over to the computer. I felt my chest tighten up in a hurry as I watch her stick the chip in the monitor and sit down in the chair in front of it. I watched as Shiris, Steph, and Mulan sat down in the seats on the opposite side of the room.

"So…" I say awkwardly as I inch my way behind her, "What exactly are you looking for."

"Any information that would deem you to be a liability to this team." Mayumi said not bothering to look at me.

"What the hell does that mean?" I question looking over her shoulder at the screen as the information is being downloaded into the system. Mayumi lowered her head and rubbed the bridge of her nose with her fingertips seeming to be a bit irritated. I try to smile sweetly, but then remember she's not looking and replaced that expression with a frown.

"It _means_, Julie, I am looking for information as to whether or not you are a burden to the mission."

"By burden you mea-"

"Julie!" She cuts me off abruptly, "Just be quiet and I'll tell you if anything is wrong. You can stop looking over my shoulder and go sit down." I raised an eyebrow at her and leaned back, putting my hands behind my head.

"Whatever you say…" I say sounding bored. I turned around and took my seat next to Shiris. She smiled sweetly at me and I tried to look at her, but found it easier to stare at the floor. What is everyone going to think of me? I'm really just completely on edge, trying to hide that fact as best as I can, and if these results show- No they can't, right? Right? How accurate _are_ these things anyway? Can they possibly pick up that I-

"Julie?"

"Yes?" I reply, trying to sound cheerful. Mayumi turned her head sideways to look at me from the corner of her eyes.

"Did you… take anything recently?" Mayumi questioned and I freeze. Well, here we go.

"What do you mean?" I am trying to sound innocent or buy myself some time to think this all through. I must be quite a bad liar.

"Pills, Julie." Mayumi says sternly. I laugh awkwardly as the others girls had turned to look at me, I laughed as long as I could; still trying to buy myself some sort of time in this quickly ticking clock of mine.

"Like for headaches? I get those once in a-"

"Drugs. I am talking about substances. Preferably _illegal _ones…" Looks like my time has run out. Yup, everyone was staring at me now. Too bad I haven't thought up anything clever or witty to tell her. She watched me carefully as I shifted in my chair a bit.

"Relatively speaking... There are a lot of drugs one can take, right?" I watched as she only raised an eyebrow at me. I kept quiet, not allowing any more words to escape my lips. I feel everyone's eyes on me, digging into my skin like mails from a monster. I am merely digging my own grave aren't I? I guess I never thought this would happen… Who would have thought Jane didn't trust us? I mean maybe she has a reason to... Look at me; I'm a fraud of a pilot. Mayumi turned her head back to the computer and read off the screen.

"You blood test shows you have extremely high traces of Math-" I tried coughing loudly to get her to _stop _saying the full word. I mean, for fuck sake, right? She only waited for me to finish before continuing, "Mathylen Dioxy Meth Amphetamina... this is-"

"That's Ecstasy?" Shiris said still staring at me. I couldn't read her face very well.

" Ecstasy, yes. I usually take 'Blood Banger', gets you feeling _pretty _good I'll tell ya!" I say in a sarcastically dragged out tone of voice. By the looks of Mayumi's face, she did not find this very amusing. Deafening silence filled the air and I was ready to lose it.

"Julie-"

"You don't need to say it Mayumi, I am _aware_." I say, cutting Mayumi off as I roll my eyes and lean back in my chair.

"When did you last take this?" Mayumi questioned.

"Sometime before we left L2. In space the high is way more extreme." I say twirling my figure in the air.

"May I ask why then?" Shiris asked in a polite way. I rocked back and forth in my chair for a moment before I decide to answer.

"No, you may not. You can ask _why not_ though..." I groan out those last words like I was being interrogated… oh wait I _am_ being interrogated. Needless to say I am rather frustrated that I am in this current situation. Sure I got myself here, but I'd rather be fully high right about now… What a buzz kill.

"What is the reason for doing such a thing? It's not necessary to take drugs." Steph burst out, with such a way of tone it sounded like she was trying to demand some sort of concrete answer from me. Do I actually have one is the more appropriate issue to address here. She seemed rather upset by this. I wonder if she even knows how good it feels. If she did, I don't think she'd be asking these questions.

"Not necessary for _you_ maybe…" I say with a deep sigh looking up at the ceiling. This sort of conversation is making me rather uncomfortable; but my semi tricked out mind can't seem to get myself out of this position I am currently being threatened by.

"Are you still high now?" I heard someone ask, but I didn't bother to register whom. Was I spacing out?

"I sure as hell hope so…"

"Julie, I need some more definite answers from you here!" Mayumi clear-cut loud tone hit through my eardrums. She then sighed and retorted back to a calmer one, "Please. I am… concerned."

"We all are…" I heard that whisper next to me. Shiris was sitting motionless. I raise my eyebrow at her for moment. She's never expressed that sort of word usage toward me before, I guess these are odd circumstances, but... We are not the type of people to do so I guess. I shrugged before leaning forward in my chair.

"Look…" I say beginning slowly, "Let me ask you this first…" I guess I had everyone's attention now, considering the room fell silent with only nods for acknowledgement as response.

"Do you know the feeling when the world starts scattering into fragments? Like the reality you once knew and believed in has suddenly disappeared, leaving you alone in the dark and suffocating for answers? Everything is in question and your mind is wild like an untamed monster, gnawing at every little thought and emotion that springs up in your senses?" I pause as an allowance to answer, but everyone stayed quiet. I watch the computer screen for a moment before continuing.

"Personally, it hit me hard when I was in L2 reliving the madness of The Maxwell Church Massacre again, not the mention all the damage from the previous war. Figures it was my idea to begin reconstruction, yet I'm the one who goes nuts…" I try my attempt at a laugh, but it comes out as a tight cough. I lowered my head for a moment.

"That memory rips my soul to pieces like a memory that I am continually revisiting every day. I just… needed a break." I look back up at Mayumi and she's still staring at me. I look to the others and they were doing the same. I wonder if anyone is really listening to what I am saying or if they have already made up their minds about me. I lean back in my chair placing a grin on my face.

"Once I found out about 'Blood Banger', some high dosages form of an ecstasy pill that was only available in the colonies… it is like being in a dream world all day long. Reality is as real as I _want_ to make it and I love that feeling. I am in control." The smile feels suddenly too heavy for my face and I feel gravity pulling my expression downward.

"Feelings are fleeting after all, and mine were no exception. If you can't feel, you're not really human right? At least that's how I see it. So… I took a lot of that stuff. Made me feel more like a human in touch with their normalcy instead of some erratic shell of emotions. Made that darkness go away..." I found myself pausing for a moment, trying to gather exactly what else to say. I'm realizing I can talk a long time about this topic surprisingly. I just wonder if any of it is _actually_ relevant.

I know I keep taking these drugs to feel... or is it the other way around. I've lost track I guess. Actually, I don't think I care enough to make a more clear difference between the two. Everything is chaotic and fragile in my mind anyways... Should I tell my friends that something is terribly wrong? Yes. Will I? No way. I'd rather not think about fixing up the place anyway, too much work isn't it? It's not that I'm lazy, per say, I just don't _feel_ like it. `Feel` I don't know the definition of that work anymore.


	23. Chapter 23: Shiris, The Uncertainty

I watched carefully as Julie closed her eyes softly. I am quite surprised this is all coming out so suddenly. I was careful not to show my emotions on my face however; she is hyper sensitive to a strong degree. My mind is racing into the 'how's, 'why's, 'what's, and so on. I just never thought thi-

"It's not like anyone would notice much of a difference. I'm energetic and kind of 'out there' to begin with naturally, so why not be able to _feel_ that way on the inside." Julie let out a slight giggle of sorts, not sure how natural it was though. She then opened her eyes and looked around the room. I could tell she was searching our eyes to figure out what we were all thinking. Her eyes were a bit 'wild blue yonder' in my opinion. When I look back now… Yes, she seemed quite high when she first got here. I'm surprised I didn't notice it before. What a difference in perspective a small dose of information holds.

"Are you judging me in your head right now?" she asked after a few silent moments went by. I focus on her to see who she was looking at, but she was staring at the floor again.

"Do you really blame me? Honestly, is it that hard to believe when you really think about it? We are 5 people with completely different backgrounds thrown into the same mess of sorts anyway..." Mayumi was still glaring at her from across the room. I stared at the floor for a moment. Julie began tapping her foot loudly on the ground; I think she was signaling everyone that she was done talking. That, or she was irritable and uncomfortable.

"No." Four unanimous voices said at once. Julie was certainly taken aback by the sudden volume of that one word.

"No, I don't blame you." I finally stated again with quite intensity. Why would we judge her? All the shit we've been through during the last war together? Not to mentioned being hated by pretty much everyone in the universe for a period of time… I'm more surprised that she's the only one trying to cover up her emotions with a substance…

"What? Really?" She said tilting her head to look at me, her confusion was written all over her face.

"Do I approve? No. However, do I blame you? Absolutely not." Mulan spat out those words a bit harshly, but I think she meant well. I heard Julie sigh in relief, as the air escaped from her lips resembled a sort of 'damn' sound.

"Sure wasn't expecting that reaction!" she let out a laugh and put a hand behind her head. I looked at her with very serious eyes, but she wasn't paying much attention. She was patting her thighs a bit; I think she's still nervous. What are signs of withdrawal anyway? I put my hand on her shoulder, but I couldn't come up with any words to say to her. I guess I don't have much to say on the subject matter.

"Whether or not we 'approve' of this matter or not is irrelevant." I hear Mayumi say in the monotone and I watch Julie's expression turn into one of pain.

"Does Jane _really_ need to know about this?" I had to bring it up after all, "I mean, it's not like Julie is going to be high during our missions, _which I am right about, yes?_" I hiss at Julie and she jumped a bit in her seat.

"Not if you talk like that, no!" She said recoiling a bit. However, I wasn't quite up to the challenge of fully trusting her on that statement, I'd rather not press the matter right now. Mayumi stared at the computer screen for a moment. She then turns her chair back around.

"This is in the results, I cannot change them." She states and Julie lowers my head partially defeated, "As the results say, you are in perfect condition for a mission." she began again and all of us glance over at her, raising many eyebrows in question, "By the way, something seems to be up with this system and I am not as skilled with computers as you are..." She says glancing at Julie, "would you mind fixing this for me?" She said rising out of her chair and heading toward the bathroom door.

"I- Are you serious? But-" Julie began but was cut off.

"Oh, and Julie? Don't screw up, okay?" She entered the bathroom and closed the door. I turned to look at Julie in question and she was smirking. She sat there for a moment with her eyes focused on the computer.

"Thanks Mayumi, I owe ya one!" She said suddenly, hopping up from her seat with a laugh. All I could do was blink several times as I watched Julie type away at the computer. Was this really happening? Was Mayumi _defying_ Jane's orders? This is _not _going to go over well. Oh my- if she ever found out. Even more so, she certainly trusts _us _all to keep out mouth shut, doesn't she? I look over at Steph and she has an ugly stern expression on her face. I've never seen her look so mean; I can only imagine what she is thinking. From the looks of it, she was completely against what Julie was doing. I heard Julie 'hee hee hee'ing as she sat back up from the monitor. At first she sounded like she said, 'some fun along the way' But I must be hearing things. She had her hand over her mouth for a moment before she turned around and walked back over. She turned to me and gave me this 'I can't believe it!' look and I shrugged. I can only wonder exactly what Mayumi's motives are for this. Otherwise, why would she disobey Jane? Something doesn`t feel right about this...

"Well, that was painless!" Julie says trying to sound humorous, but I look at her seriously. She gave me a two-figure salute as Mayumi steps out of the bathroom and walks over to me.

"Chip." She mutters and I place mine in her hand. She walks back over to the computer and sits down. I fiddle with my hands for a bit as I wait for the results to process. I wonder if Jane is checking us to see if we have broken in some way, shape, or form due to the war. The stress we get put under is one thing-

"Well everything seems normal except," She cleared her throat before continuing, "Your brain waves are…" Mayumi chucked my chip back at me.

"Yes?" I question politely as I caught it with one hand.

"I don't want to say erratic, because currently they are not, but rather, 2 days ago they were on an extremely high level. I am not one to pry-"

"Did you have a fight with Trowa or something?" Julie says with a laugh. Mayumi glared at her.

"Did something happen is what I was going to ask." She dryly stated.

"Happen?" I pondered for a moment. What does she mean? "No, not that I can think of…"

"You sure?" Julie said in question leaning closer to me. She had a crooked smile placed on her face.

"No. No I didn't." I said in a wryly tone as my head suddenly felt numb. My eyes played tricks on me as the colors danced around the room like fairies skipping around each surface. My head felt like an eruption of sorts, which sent my senses flaring as I tried to think straight. A few loud sounds- I closed my eyes and rubbed my temple with my right hand. No sensory light felt so peaceful…

"Are you okay?" I heard Julie questioned suddenly from beside me, startling me to be honest, as she had her hand on my shoulder.

"Yes I'm fine, I just have a slight headache." I spoke as I opened my eyes and glanced around the room. Everyone was giving me a wild look. Like I had said something unpredictable, "What?"

"Di- did you just- wait, what did you say?" I heard Julie jumble her words around as she stared at me.

"What do you mean what did I just say? I said 'I have a headache'?" I didn't think it to myself. A bit irritated now. What is this sudden odd cross-examination?

"No, before that…"

"I'm sorry?" I shake my head a bit. I am in no mood for these petty gam-

"Does she not _remember_?" Julie asked to Mayumi.

"Remember what?" I questioned as Mayumi and Julie looked at each other in confusion. I turned to look at Steph and she had her hand over her mouth, while Mulan was giving me a concern look. I wanted to laugh at all of them. Was this a joke? What has gotten in to everyone?

Or what has gotten in to me even? My head still feels a little numb. Was that a migraine of some sort? It wasn't painful, it just left me feeling a little tired, but… Moments before Mayumi was talking about my brain waves being on a different level before. I'm still trying to think back to other day, was I that much in thought that I cannot remember what just happened?

Thinking back to a couple days ago, getting the news about the mission did surprise me... Maybe that's what was sending my brain into a bit of a frenzy? Naturally all those emotions and memories tied from the war would surface after a while, yes? Or... should I tell them about the dreams- no... That's irrelevant right now.

Shit... Why is this all so confusing?


	24. Chapter 24: Steph, The Fear

"I'm sorry." Julie said putting her hands up in the air, "Did I just step into another reality or something?" I looked at Shiris in horror. How could she- does she know what she was talking about?

"You were just muttering to yourself for a good minute there, Shiris…" Mulan said slowly as to spoon-feeding Shiris the words so she wouldn't choke on them. Shiris started to laugh. I began to nod my head up and down frantically, trying to signal to Shiris that we were not messing around with her. We just wanted an honest answer! I look over at Julie, who kept opening and closing her mouth, trying her best to come up with something to say. I think the rest of us had similar struggles.

"What exactly was I 'muttering' to myself about?" Shiris asked in an unconvinced tone of voice. Julie looked at the floor for a moment.

"You were muttering about the war…" Julie began before looking back up at her, "The- the war. You were talking about how the war has destroyed the ten of us. Things like that." Julie trailed off a bit. 'Things like that?' I wonder why she isn't mentioning that that's _all_ she said for the full minute? She repeated the same line over and over aga-

"I'm not following… I didn't say anything like that." Shiris said looking at Julie in a confused way.

"Where you thinking it?" Mayumi asked. Shiris glanced at all of us before she looked at the floor.

"Well, maybe I was, I don't really remember…" Shiris said putting her fingers to her lips as she pondered. To be honest, I am a little worried about the outcomes of these 'tests' so far! Julie is apparently an absurd drug addict and Shiris is going insane? What is going on?

"I cannot deal with this, please say you two are joking?" I blurt out suddenly looking between Julie and Shiris, "Is this a joke?" Julie was glaring at me while Shiris was just shaking her head.

"Steph, I'm sorry, but I don't know what everyone is talking about right now. I-" Shiris said in an airy way, she was still thinking I'm sure. I watched Julie's eyes for a minute; she was deadly focused on me to see what I would say next about this subject matter...

"How are you letting this go on, Mayumi?" I stood up abruptly and pointed at Julie, "How can you let _her_ get away with being on _drugs_? DRUGS! How can you trust her? She's probably still _high_! And Shiris? Shiris, sounds like she's insane right now! She doesn't even remember what she _just_ said! She's completely loosing it! Can't you see? And Mulan is-" I cut off my shouting as my hands started to shake. I was so scared to finish my last sentence, however. Mulan had looked up at me with a horrifying gaze. Shiris was staring at me with her mouth open wide and Julie was shaking her head at me. I think that's the first time I had ever raised my voice to anyone on my team... I'm usually so quiet and put together. I try to stay elegant and pure but-

"Jeez, you make it sound like I'm a dangerous threat or something!" Julie said eyeing me. I flinch for a moment.

"You- you very well could be! How do I know?" I said with a high pitched sound, "All I know is I've seen the news!"

"You _have_ to be kidding me, Steph..." Julie said leaning back into her chair more. I think I heard her mumble 'and you call Shiris 'insane'?' but Mayumi put her hand up to Julie to get her to calm down before turning to me.

"Steph, are you honestly contemplating whether you can trust the members of this team right now?" Mayumi said with a very stern face, "The people who went through war with you? This team, who when the world was against us, we stuck together for each other? Until the end, I might add! Through the blood, sorrow, and suffering in battle?" From the sound of Mayumi's voice, she sounded extremely angry from my reaction that I couldn't help but recoil into myself. I suddenly felt very guilty for the things I had said.

"I- I'm sorry…" I said softly and slowly sat back into my chair. Julie certainly didn't look convinced by my apology. Mulan was still holding her breath considering I almost spilled her secret.

"I am fully aware of the mission parameters and I am even _more _aware of my teammates abilities that can be performed during the most peril of objectives! _Watch_ your tone…" Mayumi oozed poison from her tongue with the last sentence that she hurdled toward me. I felt like I was melting into my chair.

"Y-yes." I muttered softly. Mayumi stared at me coldly for a moment before turning to Shiris again.

"I think you're just a little stressed to be honest, we all are." Mayumi said calmly and Julie starting clapping at her statement.

"Bravo, chief." She said merrily, which had a hint of sarcasm attached to the end of her words. Mayumi turned her head slowly to Julie and silently glared 'I will kill' ice picks at her before turning back at Shiris.

"Since you didn't have your chip back in place at the time, I cannot check your brain waves to see if they match from the other day. We will have to discuss this later…" Shiris still had a questioning look presented on her face and did not seem convinced but decided to drop the matter for the time being. I could see her face turning toward her thought process instead. Mayumi then turned to me.

"Steph, I think you need to decide now whether you can participate on this mission…" She gave me such a stern look; I thought I would be knocked off my chair. I have had my doubts since I found out about this mission, yes... However, after what Mayumi said to me… I-

"I just cannot abandon my teammates in a time of need." I said firmly staring back at Mayumi. I saw Julie and Shiris look at each other and I felt Mulan put a hand on my back for support. Mayumi slowly nodded and reach her hand out.

"Chip." I stood up and walked over to her. I reached my hand out and placed it into her palm. I wasn't nervous about my results. I don't do drugs and I'm not paranoid… and I'm certainly not pregnant!


	25. Chapter 25: Mulan, The Real

I will admit, I am less worried about telling everyone than I was before… considering all of the secrets that are pouring out right now from these other girls… Steph's outburst put the rest into perspective however, considering we are here for each other after all… even if we don't agree with our different style in methods. I watched Steph as she sat back down, abnormally upright in her chair as she waited for Mayumi to speak.

"Well…" Mayumi began turning back around to look at Steph, "Your brave waves show points of high levels of anxiety. Other than that, you seem to be okay in blood work… since you clearly aren't _on_ anything." Mayumi glanced at Julie for a moment. Julie made a '_hey_' sort of noise, which Mayumi ignored.

"That's not unordinary, right?" Steph said in a shy manner. Considering she was always a bit anxious during our last war, she does have a point. Mayumi sighed for a moment before continuing.

"The only thing I have a concern with are your methods of actions in regards to hesitation. Hesitation can lead to complete failure in a mission. Therefore, you must throw away any sense of doubt you may have in any of us." Mayumi said sternly. I watched as Julie and Shiris looked to Steph's direction as well. I watched as Steph brought her gaze to the floor.

"Yes, I can understand that." Steph said softly. I cannot help but feel bad for her in this type of position. The rest of us have very strong personalities and she is the odd one out in these situations. The four of us are willing to throw away our hesitation when it comes to these missions. However, Steph always seemed to have a hard time with this. Somehow it brings a balance that is necessary, but I don't think anyone can quite put their finger on the why in that matter. Personally Steph does seem rather weak to me in most regards. I'd never tell her this, I'd rather keep up my poise demure rather than become a cold person.

"However," Mayumi began again, "I do believe you are an important asset to this team." Steph looked up at Mayumi and she threw her back her chip. A wave of relief swept over Steph's face as Mayumi turned to me.

"Chip."

"I'm pregnant." Wow that came out suddenly, didn't it? Might as well not waste any time like Julie did mumbling about like she didn't have a clue what was going on. Let's not waste any time... Steph put her head down, unable to look at me, while Mayumi, Julie, and Shiris all were staring at me wide eyed their jaws about the hit the floor-

"I'm sorry… _what?_" Julie blurted out as she her expressions were having a fierce battle on her face.

"Mulan… are yo- are you sure?" Shiris stuttered a bit with her words. I hadn't thought about what I was going to say after I told everyone come to think of it.

"Yes." I stated and I watched Shiris make a silent 'what'? with her mouth. I hope this doesn't make her have another episode, who knows what triggers those...

"Congratulations, Mulan!" Julie suddenly said with a bit of awkwardness attached to her sentence structure, "I will admit, I thought mine secret was pretty shocking, but you certainly take the wind from underneath me!" she finished with an awkward laugh followed by a few random hand gestures. Shiris smacked her on the arm. I wanted to roll my eyes but refrained from doing so. I think she just wants more attention.

"Mulan… does Wufei know about this? Clearly, he doesn't! Otherwise you wouldn't be here, right?" Shiris hit the mark. I took a deep sigh trying to calm my nerves.

"No, he doesn't."

"So you're not that fair along then?" She questioned.

"I'm about 12 weeks." I say with a sigh, I do wonder exactly how much information people are going to want.

"Mulan..." I heard Shiris whisper. I think she was at a loss for words at this point, which I would be too in a situation like this. Frankly, I'm still trying to get my head around this whole thing. I only found out a couple days ago...

"Mulan." I heard a stern voice say and I look up to Mayumi. She was holding her stare on me carefully, as if trying to find a proper way to gaze at me without such a sense of hardness, "This is pretty dangerous." I'm surprised she said anything, considering it's all pretty straightforward and obvious. I held my head down for a moment before I gave a deep sigh.

"I know it is. I know the whole thing of it is... I just couldn't bring myself to tell Wufei. He was so focused on this upcoming mission, so determined, and so strong minded that I could never break that focus of his... I simply couldn't do it."

"Mulan... you're pregnant! I think this is the exception to that! He needs to know!" Shiris raised her voice at me at the end of her sentence. I can understand where she is coming from, but she doesn't know Wufei like I do. He can be very destructive if he is broken from his concentration. I just- he is scary sometimes.

"This isn't a good idea, you should be at home resti-" Steph began but was cut off by Mayumi.

"A pregnant woman isn't a cripple. She can still do work just like the rest of us, if she so desires, especially if she's only 8 weeks."

"But-" Mayumi stood up swiftly and walked over to me, sticking her hand out. I gave her my chip before Mayumi walked back over to the computer.

"If nothing else is _different_ about you, then I can clear you for work." Mayumi said with a icy tone, "I will let you decided when you deem it necessary to stop working, because you know yourself better than I do." Mayumi glanced at me before going back to the computer. I was a bit surprised by her reaction to be honest. I saw Shiris glance at me, probably at a loss for words still. Julie seemed somewhat amused by the situation, but I think she's more enjoying the fact that everyone might forget the fact that she is a drug addict. I frankly don't trust her one bit with this new acquired information about her...

"Look..." I began a bit unsteadily, "I am just not ready to tell Wufei and I don't want him thinking anything is different about me or the missions. He just isn't in the right mindset to take this information in properly..." I glance at the other girls who were listening quite intently.

"We understand that Mulan." Julie said quietly, "We just don't want you to go hurting yourself for no reason."

"I won't be." I say while leaning forward in my chair slightly, "I know this is a big issue, and I really wouldn't be here if I thought I was endangering myself and my... child." I stay quiet for a moment, in my thoughts obviously. I am trying to sound as brave and strong as I possibly can in front of the other girls... It's just difficult when I know the raging force that will come once this news gets out to my husband. As I try to think of the many ways that he may react to such news, they seem to be getting worse and worse in my mind; so elaborate they easily become. He could absolutely freak out and I think the other girls aren't aware of that fact-

"Seems your blood work and brain waves are normal." Mayumi interrupted my thoughts, "I believe you are fit to work on this team." She gave me a bit of a nod and threw my chip back at me. I felt slightly relieved for a moment, but her eyes kept staring at me.

"Yes, Mayumi?" I questioned, I wasn't sure what else she would say to me at this point... considering it's all out in the open now.

"I know I don't need to say this, but you need to be careful." Mayumi stated while staring at me, conveying a clear message of sternness in her gaze. I could feel the others gazes on me as well. I know they are worried, especially when Wufei does not know. I just hope this secret can stay safe for the time being... I am just too much of a coward to bring it up at this point and time. I'm not sure if I am pathetic or being an intelligent decision maker.

"I will, Mayumi. Thank you." I say softly. Mayumi then looks around the room for moment, in a pondering sort of way. She's thinking about something. When I really think about it, I'm not sure how I feel about my situation. I don't think I've thought enough about it to make a proper solid feeling form. It's not that I'm ignoring my feelings necessarily, rather I haven't had time within myself to let anything form. Is that a bad thing, I wonder?

"Well... this is a lot to take in." Mayumi says in one breath, "I-" She then stopped and put her head down.

"What's wrong, Mayumi? Do you have a secret, too?" Julie laughed, I think she was joking around, but Mayumi`s face became a bit twisted after her words. Julie, obviously, pushed further seeing her reaction.

"You do, don't you? Come on now, you might as well tell us, right? I mean hell, I poured out my soul to you guys!" Julie said waving her hand in the air without care. I will admit, now that I know such information about her, I want to keep questioning whether she is high or not.

"Let's just say I have another job to deal with that Jane doesn't know about." Mayumi said with confidence. Another job, she says... how _incredibly _specific.

"And what may that be?" Shiris questioned after a few moments. However, Mayumi did not seem like she wanted to say more on that subject.

"As some of you may have some issues at the moment... I will let this slide. I have already been through a war with you all and I don't plan on having any else on my team. That is my final decision." I watched as Julie saluted, Shiris smiled, and Steph nodded her head slowly.

"Glad you trust us!" Julie said with big grin, "I do believe we are the only people worthy enough for these jobs!" Mayumi only nodded at Julie`s statement in agreement. She acted as if she had ignored her statement, but I believe Julie was right. We are the only ones who can do these missions after all. Especially as women... we are highly trained and skilled in a various array of fields.

"So Jane..." Shiris began; naturally someone had to bring this up again, "Are you going to tell her all of this?" I watched as Mayumi leaned forward in her chair and eyed us all.

"In Julie`s case... No, I am not. I'm not sure how Jane would react to such information... so I will be keeping a close eye on you at the very least." She glanced at Julie who was waving her hand in the air lightly as if swatting away a fly.

"Yeah, yeah..." Julie sighed. I think she wanted to say more on the matter but refrained, trying not to sound too cliché.

"Shiris, only your brain wave patterns are slightly abnormal, which from the readings could just mean stress." Mayumi looked at Shiris but she was looking down at the ground, "Is there something that you aren't telling us?" Julie put her hand on Shiris` shoulder. Shiris looked around the room a bit before speaking.

"Well... I've been having these dreams of some sort..." She trailed off for a moment before sighing and continuing, "Dreams about the last war, that have been unsettling to me."

"Like how?" Julie questioned.

"At first I believe them to be flash backs, some specific memory that I am reliving, but then usually something goes terribly wrong or someone gets killed who is still alive presently. It is... very strange. I keep wondering if I'm asleep or dreaming, or if this really is a memory? When I wake up sometimes my head feels a little numb."

"Isn't that kind of what happened before?" I asked as she shrugged to me her answer.

"I'm not really sure to be honest." Shiris shook her head as if trying to jog her memory. Mayumi looked stern but calm as she spoke.

"You'll be alright, but I do think you need some sort of stress relief before you begin this mission. Look into that please..." As Mayumi`s intentions were true, I hear Julie giggle and say something along the lines that involved `Trowa` and `can help` soon followed by a light smack on the arm from Shiris.

"Just saying!" Julie shrugged still laughing. Mayumi rolled her eyes before looking at Steph, but couldn't hide a small smile from appearing on her face briefly.

"As long as you keep your hesitation at a minimum, there should not be a problem... right?" Mayumi asked and Steph nodded her head quickly.

"Ye-yes!" She said with a small smile as she choked on her words a bit. Mayumi stared at her for a moment. I wonder if she was having doubts already. She then looked to me.

"I don't need to say anything to you, I know you can handle your current situation." She said with a small nod to which I returned.

"Yes." I confirmed and Mayumi stood up.

"As I am supposed to ask you about the past year... I feel as I already have quite a clear picture that I can report back to Jane with... With a bit patching here and there naturally. Which leaves nothing else left for discussion... Looks like we're done here. `

"Alright!" Julie jumped up from her chair and stretched. The rest of us slowly got up from out of our chairs.

In the end... I don't really know what I'm doing. I will not falter in my smile and pride, but I cannot help but have my thoughts drift off into hesitation.

You know... It is funny how we trust each other like this. We have so many secrets that we keep from each other, yet everyone seems so trustworthy when we say that we are `alright`... but are we really? Are we simply lying through our teeth to get past talking about a matter that is greater than all of us? Most of our problems have to do with the war, right? From the pain, suffering, and emotional turmoil of being a part of whether or not the earth and colony have a bright future. It is such a grave task we have, and we are so young... How are we supposed to push ourselves to the limits over and over again? Clearly it is taking a toll on all of us. From drugs to mental breakdowns. It seems only a perfect soldier can outwit their own feelings.


	26. Chapter 26: Hiiro, The Strong

Light chatter, that's all that was being said around the table. Duo was the main source of conversation, considering he does tend to run his mouth, especially when he gets nervous... I would quietly nod in agreement and understanding once in a while, but I wasn't particularly paying attention to him. My mind was wandering off to another topic.

Frankly, I used to be the type of perfect soldier to want to eliminate all obstacles. I learned the hard way that that is not the way to go about this kind of `business` us pilots find ourselves in. It eventually gets you into trouble, and I'm glad in the long run I didn't kill any of my present allies. Maybe I never intended to in the first place, considering I had a difficult time doing so. However, when it comes to this Firefight... I need to eliminate them in a fashion that doesn't affect the rest of this preventer team. I use the term eliminate loosely however, more like dealt with. Sometimes I catch myself using words I don't mean to... In the end, I'd rather been the one to kill my teammates then some low life of a rebel group. May sound harsh, but I mean this in the nicest way possible!

I shouldn't be concerning myself with matters such as that. Considering Jane seems to have some sort of inkling that some of us are not up to battle standard anymore. Whether or not I agree with that is irrelevant. I am not one to question Jane`s motives, but I don't believe any of these pilots have changed so drastically that they would be a disservice to her. I guess the meaning of `disservice` might be different in her mind.

The girls appeared from around the corner, looking a bit sullen as if they had been through the mission already. I heard Duo start to laugh.

"It looks like you guys had some sort of a confession by the looks on all your faces!" I watched as Duo's statement triggered an uneasy tension that rippled through them all like a wave. Julie laughed nervously.

"You know, girl talk!" was all she seemed to muster before taking her seat again. I glanced at the guy's side of the table.

"Well, let's get this over with." I state dryly and stand up. I watched Mayumi as she took a seat. I couldn't read her eyes as she stared back at me, trying to convey some sort of silent message. I think we might have a problem, by the sullen look on her face. We'll have to have a brief meeting before our departure. I walked out of the room as the others followed me into the laboratory. Wufei shuts the door, being the last one inside, and the 4 of them take a seat across from me.

When it comes to allies, I used to think I didn't need anyone... I never realize how much I didn't know until I met my fellow pilots. Everyone had a skill or a point of view that I never would have thought of. Once I realized that I began to secretly latch on to the knowledge my comrades bestowed. I guess I'm glad I never killed any of them. They were never my enemies to begin with. That being said, I guess I should be glad I didn't kill myself during the last war... but I've never given myself the chance to think about that.

I have this small lump in my throat from doing this. This all makes it seem like I don't trust my allies... my- my friends. If it were up to me, I would never make them have to prove that they were worth anything. They already did so and beyond to me by being my ally in the last war. I will never need my comrades to prove to me their worth. That would be irrelevant from now on. Anything in the future that comes our way, I have them on my side. This is all I need to know.

"Now..." I began as I cleared my throat, "I will be reading your brain waves, blood testing, and asking some questions about the last year. Simple, yes?" They all nodded in agreement, "If you would remove your chips and give them to me..." They did so promptly, no questions asked. Duo practically threw his at me to which I followed with a glare. He only grinned in his foolish sarcastic way that he does and I placed his chip in the computer.

"Now, what would exactly get us kicked out of the organization?" Duo laughed slightly, rocking back in his chair a little putting his hands behind his head. I glanced over at him to watch his movements. He didn't seem nervous surprisingly, only curious.

"Anything that _I_ would deem a nuisance to a mission." I say and Duo laughs again.

"Heh, well that could anything... right?" I could feel him staring at me, but I chose to ignore him and focused my attention on the screen in front of me. Blood work seems okay... Brain waves? For Duo seem normal enough...

"Looks like you are fine physically." I turn my head to look at him and he's smiling his shining winning smile.

"Well Naturally!"

"Then... provide me with some details of the previous year." I demanded quite strongly. I don't want to give the impression that I particularly would rather not know too many details, however as Jane requests...

"Well..." Duo paused for a moment with his thoughts, "I was on L2 rebuilding the Maxwell Church, as you know, with Julie of course." He grinned at me for a moment. Clearly he doesn't think he's done, right?

"...and?" I question trying to make him talk more.

"I'm not sure what else you need to know, I spend all of my time helping with the rebuilding process, Quatre knows all about that. The rest of my time I spent with Julie, he, you know..." He had a huge grin on his face for a moment, clearly thinking about personal matters. I kept my gaze stern on him, trying to pry his head open with my eyes. I just need information, Duo. I know you can tell that by my staring-

"Yeah, yeah, Hiiro. I gotcha ya." He said in a bit of a mumble. I am glad I have an ability to not need conversation to convey what I need.

"Well?"

"There's not much else to say..." Duo said shrugging, he had a small glint in his eye. He's lying clearly. However, should I push on is the question. I watched Duo glanced at Quatre and then stretch his arms in the air.

"Been working with Quatre on the side, so... He's a good business man, I'm learning a lot actually." He smiled slightly then continued, "I just spent time getting my head straight, you know?"

"We all have..." Quatre chimed in softly, nodding. As I do agree with that statement, I decided not to acknowledge it as such. Duo sighed.

"It's been rough, that I wouldn't lie about. There are things that are unspeakable and there are things that we just will never mention again, right? Things tha- that we just..." Duo began to trail of and he closed his eyes. I know he couldn't continue what he was thinking in his head. It was enough as it is... he didn't need to say it. It is what it is after all. Words aren't really necessary, since we all have been through the same thing.

We are soldiers, in a war that was created when peace was a far away grasp, farther than the stars, and farther than our dreams were allowed to reach. Everything seemed impossible, yet we followed those orders... since that was all we had.

I think now, we have our own lives and our own minds to think with. It leaves everything to be more complicated this time around. It isn't because we are hesitating, no... that's not it at all. We just have tragedy in every area of our hearts now; without ever speaking of it ever existing. We know it's there and knowing that is enough... because that's how it has to be.

However, I fear that the zero system may have had a drastic effect on our mentality... At least this is what I believe the reasoning behind these background checks are. That system... brought out the worst in all of us... and it's still lingering within our minds. I'm sure Mayumi isn't aware of this fact either.


	27. Chapter 27: Duo, The Brave

I guess I ended up not finishing my sentence, didn`t I? Heh... I guess it`s not needed in the end. It is unneeded, I guess. It`s not like I`d be saying anything that no one else knows or thinks or feels already...

Maybe I am just crazy, you know? I think if I am than we all are, aren`t we? If one of us is crazy, we all are. We all fought in this war, as puppets, as soldiers, as enemies, as allies, as friends, as lovers, as fugitives, as thieves, as prisoners, as spies, as heroes... how is it that there were so many labels placed on us all the time? One after the other, it all seemed so fleeting what our real title was supposed to be. However, I find it far more confusing to be called a hero than a coward now a days...

Anyway... What am I suppose to say to him about what I`ve been doing, you know? Am I really up for telling him that I sell illegal drugs on a black market under various code names? _He_ doesn`t need to know that, it`s irrelevant information in regards to mission objectives, right? I certainly don`t put it on my resume for job qualities! Plus, Quatre already gets me my best costumers, that`s bad enough! I know, right? Quatre of all people...

You look at someone like Quatre, and you`d think he`s just a typical businessman, but that boy is surprisingly power hungry. When we were working on L2 he found one of my stashes of some new Ecstasy pills I just got my hands on. He, naturally, thought I was taking them! Me? Really? I don`t need them! That`s when I had to tell him that I sell the stuff and for one reason or another he seemed interested. He was actually intrigued by it! He then made a deal with me to help me out with my own personal expenses, since he knew all my money had gone to the Maxwell Church rebuilding. He helped me get clients for a small profit and I built my reputation as the `Dark Dealer`. Am I proud of this fact? Not particularly, but I`d rather spread the feeling of warmness, with a touch of insanity, instead of those moments of devastation and destruction… at least for a brief period in time. Being the God of Death has it`s down points, and mine hit hard on L2. I guess that`s my way of showing that I wasn`t feeling good. It`s not like I was on drugs anyway, though I`m not against it per say…

The black market is an interesting place, you never see faces and you never know names. My kind of place, I guess! Nameless and faceless people buying merchandise. You never have to worry about who and what you're dealing, nothing is traced and everything is done in secret, I sometimes try to imagine the type of person my clients are by their names, a little guessing game I like to play! It`s quite an interesting system, while the colonies have quite an international currency selection, makes business easy and booming. I think that`s why Mr. Businessman Winner was all for it. He loves the idea of money, which surprised me when I first found this out, knowing he`s usually so kind and generous. But, boy does he have a devilish side in regards to how much control he has over money and how it is dealt. Me? I never cared too much, as long as I got what I needed to survive and I`ve got great finds along the way, I`m pretty much a happy guy... especially with my Julie girl on my arm.

Sometimes I feel like she is the perfect angel to a dark god of death. How does that even work? The god of death falling for such a sweet angel? I feel pretty damn lucky...

There are moments in our lives that we can never forget... We all have a few don`t we? For some reason I find myself picturing back to when I first met her all those years ago. We grew up together and it wasn`t until I became a true man, an adult, that I realized what was right in front of me. I remember one summer night sitting next to her as we looked up at the moon, talking about how life on earth was so different from the colonies. I remember turning to look at her and seeing her eyes shine in the moonlight, her smile winking at me. I realized then that she was perfect. She was perfect and that I loved her. Me? Being capable of love? It was such a foreign concept to me, but I guess Sister Helen`s words stuck with me all this time... looking at her I just knew. I wanted to save her, protect her, and hold her... never letting go. I guess that`s what love is. I believed I was supposed to protect her, but she was too strong willed for me to do so anyway... heh. What a woman. Naturally I never told her that all those years ago... Sometimes I feel paralyzed by her and-

"Well... if there is nothing else relevant to say, I guess we can move on..." I hear Hiiro drone on in his monotone a bit as he threw back my chip. I caught it with one hand swiftly, jerking my sense of thought elsewhere.

"I`m really not that interesting! I just talk a lot about nothing in particular!" I say with a grin and Hiiro gives a small nod in agreement. He stares at me for a moment, as if in question. What? I try to mentally say to him. Why is he looking at me like that? Surely he doesn`t think I`m _lying_ to him. I am merely _forgetting_ to mention a few small details about my life. I find nothing wrong with that! I let some air escape my lips as I glance at Quatre. As long as he doesn`t mention anything, everything will go smoothly enough... However, Quatre always has a guilty conscience. He really does think that he lack of effort is why there isn`t any air in space... Honestly Quatre, grow a pair! You`re making me nervous with that look on your face...

I watch as Hiiro turns around to place another chip in the system for checking, assuming Trowa was next. I glance at Trowa and he has on his normal blank expression, free from emotion of any sort. I do wonder how he does it sometimes. I mean, I certainly have a difficult time from hiding my immediate reaction to things. I guess I learned to over exaggerate my emotions so that no one really questions me into further detail about what I`m really thinking, since people will believe what is in front of them if it`s believable enough. I like to think I`m mysterious in a not mysterious sort of way, it that makes any sense! But people like Hiiro and Trowa are the real definition of mysterious.

Hiiro scans the screen closely before turning back around to look at Trowa. He stares at him for a moment before continuing.

"Looks like you have some drugs in your system." He states and Trowa nods.

"Yes, yes I do." He says matter-of-factly. I raise my eyebrow at him for moment and I see Quatre put his head down. Drugs? What kind of drugs are we talking here? I guess that`s a bit of a shock, I`m sure I`m not hiding my reaction considering Trowa is now staring right at me... Hi Trowa!

"A depressant of some kind? Fluphenazine seems to be the name..." Hiiro mumbles the last bit mainly to himself, I think he`s waiting for Trowa to fill him in on more information to process on. Hiiro can be robotic when it comes to data and information input.

"Yes, I have been taking them since after the last war." Trowa said with no emotion in his words. Really? Is he serious? Moments of silence followed as we waited for Trowa to elaborate more on this subject.

Of all people I never would have thought he`d be taking something to calm his emotions... I mean, we`re talking Trowa here! I can barely get him to smile with my stupid jokes, maybe I need to work on my comedy act.

Thinking seriously here, I guess this is a hitting point for understanding more about my friends. I`m the most talkative and I talk about nonsense half of the time... it`s a shame really.

Actually, I find it funny that we became allies in the end. I mean, us? We all tried to kill each other at one point of another... Even the nicest man on earth Quatre went mental! I knew no one would ever kill me in the end, I`m just too lovable.

When it comes to my friends, I know that I could never really understand them to a full extent. We are pretty private people even considering how much we do tell each other. I`m not sure if we`ve just brushed off the fact that we all suffering as a result to the war... I guess we simply want to believe that we are all alright. We really should ask more questions, but we`ve refrained from doing so... why is that? What are we all afraid of anyway?


	28. Chapter 28: Trowa, The Mindful

It`s not possible to change the past. However, it is possible to use the past as a way to bring in a brighter future. Even the darkest, destruction memories that we have can help us learn and grow toward a future that is better suited for us. I think we`ve all learned that by now, haven`t we? Past mistakes bring forth future ripples in time. Every simple thing we do in our lifetime causes a reaction to events to come...

So why do I sound so calm talking about my recent drug use? Simple. That`s my nature... but more so because I don`t want to cause any unnecessary unsteadiness to this new ripple of events. I keep my expression calm so I can study the reactions of others. I would rather the word "depressant" in my friend's mind before saying anything along the line of "antipsychotic". Words are words; I'll let them think that it's the less harmful sounding one.

I don`t fear many things but I do fear reactions that I cannot guess beforehand. I`m usually good at reading people and predicting how they will express themselves after certain situations and circumstances. It makes me seem wise but it`s more along the lines of being a very good guesser. I had to become that way to make sure my emotions wouldn`t boil over. Once you train yourself to do something it`s a hard habit to quit... More so you don`t believe you need to quit, it feels too much like the perfect `you` to let go off in the first place.

After the war, I found my emotions surfacing in unexpected ways. Ways that I could not control. They were quick outbursts of some dark rage that I had never felt in myself before. I tried to cover them up as best as possible or isolate myself so that I was not found out. Shiris was the only one to see one of my outbursts... I remember her face, the hurt and confusion. I never wanted to see that on her face ever again. Which when I told Quatre about this, he suggested I take some drugs he had been contacting a fairly famous dealer on the Black Market. I was a bit shocked when he mentioned this fact about himself, but I never seconded guessed him... Looking back I`m not sure why I didn`t, maybe because I just didn`t care. I wanted my slate wiped-

"I need to know more about the reasoning behind this matter, Trowa. That`s all." My mind switches back and focuses on Hiiro. He is looking at me sternly, icy stare but his eyes showed concern, wanting to push further into my mind.

"I would rather not discuss further details in this matter. However, I will say that they are working well and there will be no further interruptions that will affect my life or mission objectives." I almost feel Quatre wince next to me as I spoke. He obviously feels he needs to say something on the matter... but I`d rather him stay quiet. I glance at him in the means to mentally say this to him. He gives a light sigh and lowers his head. I see Hiiro nod a few times toward me before speaking.

"Yes... I see." was all that passed by his lips as his gaze went back to the computer screen. I was worried for a moment he would say something else, but that`s not his nature.

"As long as we know you`re okay, buddy." Duo spoke suddenly, placing a hand warmly on my shoulder. I smile softly for a moment before turning my head to look at him.

"Yes, Duo... Thank you." I nod as he grins back at me.

There was never any bitterness between us as allies, as friends... Even though we tried to kill each other on numerous occasions, whether we were in the right mindset or not. In war, none of us ever had the right mindset in regards to who was our enemy and who was our ally. It wasn`t until our final battle that we really considered ourselves allies, or so I see it... Even saying this, we were always individual fighters in the end. We just happened to be individually fighting toward the same goal. That is what brought us together. That is our connection as pilots. So we tried to kill each other, yet we were never bitter. We understood our missions after all... I think the bitterness came from trying to figure out our lives outside of being a mindless soldier. That had a bad after taste with all of us for a while...

We hadn`t needed to have a life of normalcy for our whole lives and we certainly didn`t want to be on a spectrum of normal. Normal was far beyond us at this point that we had no idea how to react. It`s natural to be unnatural for us anyway. I believe that after taste of war had hit a nerve in me, something I never thought possible. I`m sure the others understand this.

I had to get used to the idea of having allies that I trusted in. Persistent ones at that matter. Quatre was very sure we would be friends and I never realized in the beginning that maybe I did need someone. It`s human nature to want companionship once in a while, I just never registered as being human before the war. It was a struggle, that I will not lie. I think what broke the ice surrounding my heart was Shiris in the end. There was something about her poise, the way she carried herself, and her smile. I remember that was the first time I wanted to be with someone, feel her hand in mine. I can surely thank my comrades and Cathy for breaking my heart down little by little until I could feel for myself; feel as a human would feel. The moment I realized that I was human was the most wonderful day... I will never forget it.

"I will trust you confide in us if something happens to get out of hand in regards to this matter..." I hear Hiiro drone in his monotone for a moment before turning his chair around. He threw my chip back at me, which I caught firmly.

"Yes, Hiiro. I know I have allies I can trust in." I hear Duo laugh next to me.

"Yeah... you said it!" He said with a big grin. Quatre was smiling as well, since he`s always wanted us to be as close as true friends. He certainly got his wish, didn`t he? I glanced over at Wufei, who has his eyes closed and his arms crossed. If you didn`t know better, you`d probably think he was sleeping... but he was listening intently to each word we said; part of his sense of righteousness.

"Well said." Hiiro spat out a bit roughly but his words had a hint of agreement attached to them, "This mission is crucial and we have more to fight for this time around." Hiiro then nodded toward Quatre and turned back around to the computer.

We will always have something to fight for, that`s human nature. We always create a purpose to fight for what we believe in and we drive to make that known to others. We are alive with such a purpose we have created for ourselves. In battle, I respect that the most in my enemies, and I treasure that the most with my allies.


	29. Chapter 29: Quatre, The Wise

couldn`t help but feel a bit guilty for the new information being brought out about my friends. I mean... I have been a key factor in many transactions with Duo and Trowa recently. I never told Duo that one of his clients was Trowa and vice versa; I didn`t have the heart too really. It`s so much easier to go about the black market as a nameless faceless person. Therefore, I kept it as that. Though my guilty conscience must be written over my face, considering Duo keeps glancing at me whenever he gets the chance.

"Next, we have Quatre..." I hear Hiiro mumble to himself as he watches the screen closely. I don`t believe he`ll find anything abnormal with me, maybe during the last war, but not this time around...

I believe I have become a stronger person since the last war. I was brought up by kindness and I wanted to return that to others. I look back and think that maybe I was a bit naive. Naive to the fact that I was fighting in a war and I had a choice whether or not I could give my kindness to my enemies... have it reach them and they understand where I`m coming from. Did I actually think my kindness would reach them? Yes... I did. Did it ever do so? That I`m not really sure about. Others say it did, and maybe my heart even told me that as well, but I never had any confirmation on that. That burns deep within my soul from time to time, even now.

I am still haunted by the past war, as we all are. I believe myself to have been possessed so drastically that I couldn`t think straight... and that still destroys me inside to a degree. It is hard to forgive another for the mistakes they made... but it`s much harder to forgive yourself for the sins that you`ve committed; whether in the right state of mind or not. It is so hard and it is so painful.

"Everything seems to be stable." Hiiro stated as he turned around and threw the chip back at me. I caught it with both hands gracefully and stared at it for a moment...

I think my conscience gets the best of me. I saw one of my friends trying desperately to repair and rebuild his past and I had to help him in any way I could. Whereas help him sell drugs was the last thing I thought I`d be doing, but the look on Duo`s face when he said that he felt like bringing back the smiles on people`s faces with the rebuilding of the church... I really didn`t have the heart to bring up any hostility in regards to his underground work. Later, I realized that I could help another one of my friends by helping Duo. Trowa seemed at a loss for what he wanted to do and I pointed him in a direction to help him make a decision regarding his issues. I`m surprised he never asked more advice from Shiris to be honest. I think he was embarrassed to an extent and I know he didn`t wanted to hurt her any longer. He desperately wanted to protect Shiris from his dangerous emotions he held from the war. I guess he needed a way to suppress such negative feelings until he figured out a better way to deal with them.

I fear these are the kind of secrets that could destroy people from the inside out.

I think the more dangerous secret is Julie`s... she needed an easier way to get her drugs and Duo was the way to do it. She approached me on L2, during the rebuilding, desperate and she asked me to buy the drugs from Duo under an alias for her. She knew that Duo had been selling on the black market and she begged me to keep this a secret from him. As she said `it would break his heart... and I can`t do that to him` and she really didn`t want to hurt him in such a way. It was heartbreaking for me to do so, to be honest, but I wanted to make her feel better in some way. I think the past we have had between us allowed me to do so. I thought I had loved her but she had always loved Duo far more than any other thing existing in this world. At least I would have this as our secret and ours alone... Duo cannot take that away from me.

Heh. I will control everything eventually... Just you wait... Ah... I find myself wanting power and money to a great extent recently. I do like that feeling of control, not a leader of any sort, but simply that my hand is always pulling strings in the background. At least, that`s how I like to see things-

"Wufei..." Hiiro`s voice breaks my thought process. I was so deep in thought that I hadn`t noticed Hiiro had moved on to Wufei`s chip...

"Ah?" Wufei grunted in response, he had his arms crossed still.

"Your brain waves seem quite erratic." Hiiro said swiveling in his chair to face Wufei. I glanced at Wufei, who had raised an eyebrow at him for a moment.

"Meaning?" Wufei glared at Hiiro as he continued. Hiiro turned to face the screen once more before looking back at Wufei.

"Your brain waves are showing an irregular imbalance of patterns in regards to mood and mentality I`m presuming." Hiiro stated firmly. The look in Wufei`s eyes was a bit wild as he processed what Hiiro had said. It`s interesting to see those two stare so intensely at each other. As if they would launch at each other with rage at any moment in an attempt to see who`s superior.

At one point in time, I was the only one who believed we would all be friends by the end of the war. Sure, many of us went crazy and some of us tried to kill one another... However, it wasn`t meant to be like that, we were meant to be allies. We all came from very different pasts but had the same objectives. We walked the same path... I was surely the most kind hearted, which put others off, they must have thought how in the world did I get to become a pilot? Blood lust isn`t the only thing that a soldier needs... or if they need it at all. What I know is my friends have brought out the best in me in the end.

However, with Wufei, I was never sure where I stood with him. Frankly, It was very hard to understand him. I`m sure he thought I was weak... but I believed him to be weak in the same way, for he is still haunted by the ghost of Treize and his own fleeting emotions...


	30. Chapter 30: Wufei, The Stubborn

I stared at Hiiro for a moment, searching his dark eyes... what is he trying to suggest? That my mentality is off compared to the rest of this team? Bullshit. My righteousness is true and just. Hiiro knows I feel this way, so I am shocked that he is trying my patience.

"Wufei." Hiiro said crossing his arms, "It is important that you stay stable for the objectives to be successful." He says this as if I am some mental case. I feel myself growing irritated. No. I am irritated.

"Are you implying I may not be capable of any mission objectives?" I ask with a brass undertone. I`m sure Hiiro feels my angry growing in my words.

"No..." Hiiro says glaring at me, "I have every right to be concerned about my teammates mental states while the mission is in progress." He glared right back at me. For a few moments we glare at each other, unsure as to what the other will say next.

"I am fine." I state leaning back in my chair slightly, "That`s all you need to know about me." I watched as Hiiro raised an eyebrow at me for a few seconds before continuing.

"Hn..." I heard Hiiro grunt before throwing me back my chip. I know he will not push me on this matter, for if he does-

"Well, looks like we`re all fine, am I right?" Duo said leaning forward and winking at us all. For some reason I have a strong urge to rip his stupid smirk off his face, but I will refrain for now.

"So all of this information goes back to Jane?" I hear Quatre whine, and by whine I mean talk in general, it just sounds like a bit of a whine to me...

"Yes." Hiiro confirmed and stood up, "That is all."

"Alright!" Duo said bounding from his chair as Trowa and Quatre stood up. I sigh deeply before standing up slowly. What a waste of time...

We follow Hiiro as he leads us back to the main room where the girls were waiting. They looked like they were having a good time from the laughter I could hear once we entered the hallway. When Hiiro entered the room, the girls stood up, awaiting orders... as women should be obedient like this at all times. I believe in strength and I believe in power. That is why I have always taken what my male allies have said as right before I would trust a woman. They are far too sweet and irrational to be trusted most of the time. How these 5 women became part of an elite team of preventers is beyond me-

"Now that we have done our scans thoroughly, it is time for preparation before departure. Everyone is to change into their proper uniforms for their objectives; located in individual named lockers. Be on the plane at 1600. That is an order."

"Roger!" We all confirm and head to the locker rooms. I glanced at Hiiro and Mayumi who are talking quietly to each other, not following the rest of the group. I guess they have reporting to do for Jane...

Thinking back to what Hiiro had said about my brain waves... It must have to do with- no... it can`t be...My complex I had with Treize lasted far too long. Whereas I had indeed said goodbye a year ago... his memory still haunts my existence wherever I may go. He always has had something to do with this war... his presence... even years beyond his death. How am I supposed to move on if his memory hunts me down and haunts me forever? Am I bound to such a fate? What justice can prevail over that?


	31. Chapter 31: Mayumi, Lies for Me

"Hiiro... I just _can`t _do that..." I moaned my words vaguely at him, "I can`t just spill my friends darkest secrets to Jane, that iron woman... She has no remorse for such feelings." Hiiro had his arms crossed and was leaning against the wall. He closed his eyes for a moment in thought before opening them to look at me.

"We have a duty to report what is _necessary_ to Jane..." He stood up straight and turned to face me, "I believe we are to deem what is important, right?" He eyes shone unnaturally when he said those words. He then gave me a small smile before turning and walking toward the control room.

"Hiiro, but-"

"Mayumi... this is all happening for a reason. You realize this?"

"Yes, I know-"

"The Zero System." He spit out roughly, not directed toward me but his anger was more directed inwards, "Zero has to do with this... I`m sure of it."

"Zero? But... it was tested, yes it was dangerous, bu- Hiiro... how did you come to that conclusion? We all..." I trailed off as he gazed at me, mentally answering my question. He looked down at the floor for a moment.

"We have to do our report now..." He turn his head to look at me, "Let`s go."

Wanting to cry is one thing, but I want to scream. Scream at the top of my lungs until my blood boils over. There is so much inside of me that I feel that intensity starting to crawl under my skin. It is just so strong of a feeling and I don`t want to hold it back anymore. There is so much going on right now, how can we control ourselves to get this mission to be successful?

However... I have no choice but to appear calm. I guess my feet carried me to the control room, because I just realized I was standing in front of the screen, while Hiiro had sat down in the chair already. A couple clicks and the black screen abruptly turned into Jane`s stern features along with shadows in every crease. She had a unpleasant look on her face.

"Hiiro. Mayumi. Well?" was all her British lips spoke as she raised her narrow eyebrow at both of us.

"I am processing the information to you now..." Hiiro stated as he typed away on the keyboard, "Everything is in the report." I watched the screen closely as Jane read through the report next to her on a different screen I am presuming. Her eyes stayed the same stern dagger stare as she read through the report. She showed no emotion in her expression as she carefully read. Frankly, I`m not sure what Hiiro had found out about the guys and I`m hoping he didn`t relay too much revealing information about them... It would just be- It`d be cruel to do so to our teammates right? Or am I just making sure that our names aren`t tainted... If the time comes to reveal such information, then I will wait until then.

"Fine written report from you two..." She said staring back at us through the screen. Her eyes seemed devilish as she tilted her head a few times in different directions.

"Thank you, Jane." I say monotone-like; maybe this was all we needed to do-

"However..." Oh no here we go, "Is there really no other information about the others in regards to what they were doing in the previous year?" She had a crooked smile on her face as if she knew something... something that we were trying to hide. I tried to keep my expression calm, but I was at a loss for what I was going to say if she _did_ mention something. She would know that I lied right away. As for Hiiro, I`m not sure how much information he put in his-

"All the information we have already presented in our reports. No further details." Hiiro stated firmly, gladly so, otherwise my voice might have faltered.

Her stare is making my body react in strange ways. I feel paralyzed and my legs feel numb. How is it that one stare can do such a thing? I can feel my hands start to tremble as I hold onto the back of the chair. I thought I could withhold information from her, I thought I was strong enough to resist; to do it for my friends... But when you stare into those kinds of eyes, filled with blood lust, monster-like power, piercing every inch of my mind with needles, it's so incredibly difficult to stay calm... This is the only fear I know. The battlefield is nothing compared to having to stare back into those eyes...

"Very well then..." She says peering over the rim of her glasses, "All missions parameters are in order and your plane is waiting in the hanger."

"Roger." We both say in unison. She stared at us for a moment.

"Oh, and please don`t belittle me with useless information, next time." Her eyes were fiery as she placed a smirk on her face, "I will find out what I need to know eventually. I will remember this and you should remember as well..." The screen turned black as she cut the line. I gripped the back of the chair harder. She knows... She knows we didn`t report everything. I lazily watch Hiiro get up from the chair and face me.

"What did you not report?" He asks abruptly.

"I- I reported everything." I lie threw my teeth and he obviously knows I`m lying... better question is _why_ am I lying? I turn my gaze away, I couldn`t seem to look at him.

"It`s alright..." I heard him say softly as he grabs my hand with rare gentleness, "I didn`t give a full report either." I widen my eyes and look up at him. He`s smiling at me, that gentle smile that I love.

"You..." was all I could let out.

"There is no point in giving so many details. We are here for work after all. Personal life will not interfere, I believe we can all keep a level of professionalism as pilots." Hiiro squeezes my hand, "Come on, we need to change."

I`m honestly not sure how I should feel about Jane`s words. What are her motives? What does she want from us? Why does she need to know such dramatically personal information about us anyway? It really doesn`t have anything to do with the mission!

It drives me crazy trying to outthink this damn woman... my whole life I`ve been trying to do so. Trying to pry and pick the information, going through all the details into the question `why` and I never seem to get anywhere. It`s like a never-ending labyrinth, such a twisted maze I can`t find the exit to. I _need_ to find more answers and it will lead me down the right path... but when will they come?


	32. Chapter 32: Julie, Spy for Me

"Well, would you look at this sexy thing!" I gasp as I pull my outfit from the locker. Shiris is giving me a funny look.

"You... are going to wear _that_?" She says with a bit of a laugh. I pull the small blue mini tube dress out of the locker. I turn it front and back looking at it closely. It`s like a party in a dress form... a very `sexy` party.

"Ha ha, not much to it, is there? Makes me look like I`m something to be _bought_." I laugh some more, well at least I get to have some fun before the mission begins.

"It's not even in the mission parameters... 'seducing' that is..." I hear Shiris mumble to herself.

"I`m sure Duo will approve." I hear Mulan call out from down the line. I watch for a moment as she slips into a elegant Chinese high collared orange dress, with two slits on the side. There was a beautiful decor dragon embroider in the front. She quickly threw her hair into a tight bun.

"And where are you supposed to hide your gun. may I ask?" Shiris asked sarcastically as she slipped into her red mini skirt and button up tan blouse. She placed a red sailor type hat on her head with the logo of Cadman written on the side; keeping her hair in a low ponytail. She then turned to me, leaning against the locker door and raising her eyebrow at me.

"Not... quite... sure." I say slowly still examining my dress, "Maybe I should carry a bag?"

"Is this really what the casino girls wear?" Steph interrupts and moans continuously next to Shiris. She had on a black mini pleaded skirt along with a cropped light pink silk top with the logo Cadman written on the front with `babe` underneath. Steph looked down at herself before gazing up at the rest of us in what looked like despair.

"Cadman Babe? Aha!" Was all I could come up with to say. Of all people to get this job, we have Miss innocent Stephanie ready for dirty duty! Quatre will surely be stunned. Suddenly Mayumi came walking in, and without saying a word went straight to her locker and proceeded to get changed. Steph was still moaning slightly as I slipped my dress on. This thing is a _bit_ tight, may I add! Does Jane really pick these out for us? Where _am_ I going to put my gun? I will _not_ be able to run in this, by the way.

"You`ll be given a smaller gun, don`t worry." Mayumi said as if reading my thoughts. She had slipped into a dark green long gown of sorts with no sleeves and a slit up the side. She left her hair in a loose bun and placed a bright purple flower over her ear. What a group we made!

"Well we better go board the plane." Shiris said with a smile as she closed her locker door. I didn`t realize all of the others had slipped into their heels.

"I- I`ll be there in a minute!" I say as I start putting my heels on. I see Mayumi look at me.

"Hurry up, will you?" She says raising her eyebrows before disappearing behind the lockers. I pause for a moment, staring at my heel that was half on my foot. After this gets put on, it becomes _real_. We are back in a war and back to mission objectives. Failure isn`t an option, for failure equals death. There is no turning back now.

Once the other girls started to walk out of the locker rooms and I slowly pull my heel on. I check the mirror and decide to let my black hair fall over my shoulders and down my back. I hear a small creak in the floor and I look toward the wall that split the girls locker room from the guys. I smile to myself as I creep around and I peak into the boys section to see if they were done; or more so to see if a certain _someone_ was done. I was met with a pair of striking violet eyes. I giggle, I guess we think alike, as I grab his hand gently.

"Well? What do you think?" I ask slyly to him. He twirls me around delicately as he breathed a response.

"Absolutely stunning!" He grinned at me and I felt my cheeks flush. Clearly he noticed as he brushed my cheek gently with his free hand.

"You don`t look so bad yourself Mr. Maxwell!" I tease him. He was wearing black slacks with a button up black silk shirt accompanying with a blue tie to match my dress. He laid his tuxedo jacket down for a moment as he pulled me in closer.

"Good to hear!" He raised his eyebrows at me.

I simply cannot resist his charm. Denying what makes me human is impossible as I kiss him multiple times on the lips. He`s so addicting, more addicting than any of the drugs I take. It feels so real and so pure. I could never get enough. I`m sure he feels the same way, considering we can`t keep our hands off each other... Heh.

Moments like these are too fleeting. I feel lightheaded, but in a good way. That kind of feeling that I get when I get high... I chase after it with whatever I decide to do.

Plus, who knows when your last kiss with be? All us pilots can do is live in the present.

"I guess we need to go." Duo whispered in my ear and I nod in agreement, feeling a bit numb in the head. He grabs his jacket and leads me to the hanger. We made our way to where our speed line mini jet was waiting for us. Of course we have our own jet to take us places, and a fast one at that! How do you think we`d get to South Africa so quickly?

Once on board there were ten seats, two to a row in the middle of the aisles, naturally we go by numbers. Everyone else was seated already and I can already feel Hiiro and Mayumi`s famous glare stare on the pair of us... We were really already-

"You`re late." Hiiro practically hissed at us and Duo being Duo, salutes him politely.

"Sorry about that sir! I had some important matters to _discuss_ with Julie!" he said slyly and Hiiro raised an eyebrow at him as Mayumi rolled her eyes at me. Duo proceeded to bow gentlemen-like before nudging me forward and into my seat. I honestly wonder sometimes how Hiiro hasn`t managed to _kill_ Duo yet... Those two... Honestly!

I plopped down into my seat and Duo followed in my action next to me. He did look rather handsome in his outfit. He suddenly glanced at me and then gave me a wink.

"Ready to be Mrs. Maxwell?" he asked with a smirk.

"Oh! I thought you`d never ask!" I swoon a bit, sinking into my seat. He laughs and grabs my hand, holding it lightly in his. He looks at my hand for quite a while, assuming he`s thinking of something... What is he-

"Julie..." he had sad eyes.

"Yes?" I reply sweetly. He`s not acting like himself, its making my heart beat fast- no, race actually.

"If we make it out of this mission alive-"

"Please don`t talk like that!" I snap at him. He only laughed at my words.

"Let me _finish_, please!" He said glanced at me then back at my hand.

"Not if you`re going to talk in such a morbid way! You should never start a mission out with words like that!" I say grabbing his arm with my free hand and shaking him slightly. He only nodded a few times at me.

"Heh, yeah..." he smiled widely at me and I could hear myself sigh as I look at him. Stop it, you... You`re making me weak.

I laid my head on his shoulder as we heard the engine start up and I can feel myself getting sleepy. I think about funny things when I get sleepy. I sling my arm around Duo`s and nuzzle into him. Slightly uncomfortable because of that stupid middle part between our chairs, but I`ll survive...

You know... Our lives are like some far off tale, aren't they? Too bad you cannot write your life in the way you want to. Like a story book or a fairytale end. Is there a happy ending for people like us, I wonder? People who killed in war and people who destroy one`s lives while trying to protect others. We cut, we bleed, we scream, we fight... down an endless waltz of corridors and hallways. Down everything we could ever think of. We keep turning, twirling, twisting around... dancing endlessly until our feet go numb...

I subconsciously reach into my bag and pull out a small blue pill. I glance up at Duo who had his eyes closed. I stared at him lazily as I slowly bring the pill to my lips. Dry swallowing is not so bad...

Yeah...

I wonder what Duo was going to say, anyway?


	33. Chapter 33: Shiris, Care for Me

I could hear screaming... so much screaming! Death surrounds me, I can feel it in my limbs. There`s just so much suffering...

I open my eyes and all I see is crimson shaded darkness. Beams of light are bouncing from one end of my vision to the other. There`s fire everywhere and all I can see is blood. There is so- so much blood! It hurts my eyes, but I can`t look away! I`m afraid to look away, for what else is there outside my vision? Something much more horrifying perhaps? I can see various types of mobiles suits parading in the distance throughout this town.

They must... be stopped! This cannot go on! We cannot- but I feel a cold chill... I am alone.

Bright light blinds me for a few moments and my mind thumps with pain. An explosion? and another? I can`t tell anymore, it`s all becoming the same sensory signal. I can't make out what exactly is going on. I think my mind is playing tricks on me again.

I turn to my right and I see two figures standing in the distance... I can`t make out who- Trowa? No, that can`t be Trowa! Why would Trowa be here? Why would I be here? Where _is_ here? I see as the other dark figure slowly raises their arm up... holding a- a gun?

Trowa... please get out of the way! I try screaming, but my voice is mute. Something is blocking the sound from escaping my lips! I can only look around in horror. This place, I know this place! It`s the battlefield, there were so many but I remember this one specifically. I remember this town and the people screaming, everything! We were trying to defend this town from OZ, from the mobile dolls, from our enemies!

He is an enemy Trowa! He will- he will...!

Bang. Gun shot. Another. Another. Another!

"No." I hear myself whisper... Ah! My voice! My eyes snap open for the second time... What- whe- where am I?

I touch my forehead gently and I feel cold sweat trickling down my brow. It was hard to catch... my breathe. Was it a dream? No, that was real! That battle happened, it happened! But...

I look to my left and Trowa is looking at me with intensity in his eyes. This type of look reminds me of how much he loves me... for he would never give anyone else such a look. He looks so honestly concerned and his jaw is locked up tightly as he tensed up his facial features.

"Shiris?" He asked quietly as he grasped my hand tightly, "Are you alright?"

"Ye-yes..." I breathe placing my other hand on my cheek, "Bad dream!" I try to smile sweetly but it was harder than I thought. I must have made a weird facial expression, seeing that Trowa`s concerned face did not change.

"Again?" He questioned. I had told him vaguely about the dreams that I have been having, never going into much detail. I keep seeing all of my teammates die... and this time it was Trowa! They start out as such awful flashbacks, but the ending is always so... so dreadful.

"Yeah, I`m okay really! It must be the stress from our upcoming mission." I smile at him as I caressed his jaw line fondly before laying on hand back down. Trowa was still looking at me in the way as he does. I studied him for a moment. He had on red slacks and a matching button up tan shirt like mine, accompanied with the same Cadman logoed hat. He turned away to look ahead at the seat in front of him.

"I don`t want you to think you cannot tell me what is really wrong." He says quietly, still not looking at me. I trace the line of his jaw with my eyes for a moment, watching him. A small smile appears on my lips.

"I don`t think that at all." I say tilting my head at him, he still wouldn`t look at me. I forget just how much he does know about me, so he naturally can tell I`m not telling him the whole truth... but can I really tell him about my dreams? He`d just say, `it`s a dream, it`s not real`- something to that degree... which I don`t want to hear in a moment like this. The uneasy feeling is still lingering after all...

I slowly lay my head down on his shoulder. I feel him weave his hand into my hair and kiss the top of my head gently. Moments like these make me realize that I`m not dreaming and I feel my heartbeat calm. I cannot express my words of how much he means to me properly, I don't want to show how I feel too openly...it is dangerous to be left so open and bare in any situation.

I see Mayumi stand up for a moment looking at all of us sitting down. I watch her for a moment as she stares off for a moment before glancing at me. She nodded at me and I let a small smile escape my lips for a moment. She must be tense, but she`d never admit it. She sits back down abruptly and I continue on with my thoughts.

I wonder if I can sleep dreamlessly tonight, or any night for that matter. Is even possible to do? Do I have to run all of my thoughts out of my mind tirelessly before I can even begin to do so? It seems so impossible when I think about it, but I want it to be so... My dreams are so haunting. So vivid and haunting that I can`t seem to concentrate in the real world, because my dreams haunt me when I am awake.

I`m really trying to think rationally on this matter, but I cannot get the pictures out of the my head... the ones where I see my friends an-and Trowa die right before my eyes. Waking up to such a horror not having existed is a wonderful feeling, but I still feel uneasy... as if this dream or flashback or whatever it may be is trying to tell me something about the future and what it holds for us. I feel like I cannot trust my own mind but I have no choice but to do so...

I glanced at Trowa who had closed his eyes. Is he sleeping? I see a flash of bright blue eyes peek from the chairs in front of us.

"Hi." She says in an odd tone of voice. I raise an eyebrow at her.

"Hi, Julie." I say back in an un amused way. She stares at me for a moment before turning back around. What in the- is she bored already? She should be concentrating on the upcoming mission! I sigh a bit to myself. Actually, I should be doing that. I guess It doesn`t matter...

I hear the captain say that we had landed the plane. We had planned to land in the back of the casino near the helicopter pad. Was I asleep for that long? Well at least, I`m rested up for the mission...

I see everyone stand up and I watch as Hiiro and Mayumi face us.

"Everyone have their ear pieces in?" Mayumi more so demanded than asked. She was slipping her gun into her gun hold underneath her dress.

"Roger." A chorus rung through the plane.

"On your wrist, using your LTD lights, you can choose by number who you specifically want to talk to, or touch all to relay the message to everyone." She continued and everyone nodded.

"Mayumi and I will head out first getting into position." Hiiro spoke as he fixed his gun into his Tuxedo blazer, "Quatre, once inside you will head to the right and up the stairs, continuing to the pit. Present your badge and head up to the main control room. Secure the security camera and notify us when done."

"Right." Quatre said with a nod.

"Trowa, Shiris, and Steph you will head to the left. The first door is for the dealers, while the second door is for the waitress and cooking staff. Proceed to your areas and await orders from Quatre on which table to proceed to."

"Roger." The three of us chorused.

"Duo, Julie, Wufei, and Mulan, you head out into the casino floor and we will notify you of which table to proceed to for gambling and observation purposes... Don`t lose too much money." Hiiro said glancing at Duo and Julie who had devious smiles placed on their lips.

"You mean don`t _win_ too much money!" Duo said with a laugh. Duo was placing his gun in his shirt near his belt line, while Julie was strapping her tiny gun to her inner thigh. I wonder how comfortable _that_ is? She looked up at me and winked. I chuckled to myself as I tucked my gun to my gun halter in my blouse. Trowa did the same. I`m assuming the rest were doing so as well behind me.

All of us together again. I cannot help but smile at this, even if it is for a mission. It`s what we do after all. I subconsciously brush my fingers over the embroidery on my blouse. It has been a while since I`ve been in disguise. Though the thought of this impending doom that seems to be lurking in my mind is unsettling. I need to shake that before I can get myself into character.

"Are all objectives clear?" Hiiro moved on ignoring Duo`s last statement.

"Yes." We all said in unison.

"Right... Mayumi, let`s go!" Hiiro said and he headed off the plane. Mayumi turned to all of us and nodded once in acknowledge of the mission start; then continued to head off the plane.

Gun pops, explosions, and people screaming... Those flashbacks keep projecting images in my head. Images that I`d rather not see, especially when I have an important mission to concentrate on. I guess after a while war beings to look the same...

We were never really the type of people to consider true pacifism to be an achievable ideal, anyway. However, we never let go of the hope of something like that. Is that really all the world holds on to? The hope that something will one day become better? Become better than the current situation? It is what we all hope for, what we all strive for... so why? Why do we keep striving for a ideal that is impossible. It seems ridiculous in a logical sense, but humans love to keep believing in impossible things if they hope that it is not impossible.

It certainly gets me questioning if our objectives are possible or not. I mean, it's not that I doubt us at all... but I wonderful if we can keep preventing these events from happening for the rest of our lives. For once I want to live in a world of totally perfection... just a moment! I want to taste that type of feeling for a bit.

But that's a silly naive thought, isn't it?


	34. Chapter 34: Steph, Work for Me

Here we go, here we go... Is all I can keep thinking in my head right now.

Walking through the casino, I gasp at how magnificent the massive main floor room is... It`s lined with gold everywhere; the bright lights shining at every angle from the slot machines and posters flashing advertisings. There were massive statues of ancient warriors, gods, and guardians that I did not recognize. All of the people dressed like royalty, in flowing gowns, tuxedos, and party dresses all around. Every woman was dripping with diamonds and gold, sipping on colorful martinis; while the men were drinking expensive liquor and smoking the finest cigars. There was laughing and cheering from all directions, numbing my eardrums, and the casino noises were almost deafening. Everything seemed so elegant and glamorous...

The one thing I noticed instantly was the incredibly amount of armed guards scattered around the floor; at every door. I was quite shocked at how many there were in plain sight already. This wasn`t in the mission statement... I glance nervously at Quatre for a moment and he nodded toward me. He was wearing a jet black tuxedo with the Cadman logo embroider in the breast pocket. He had his hair slicked back with only a few bangs peaking through. He looks incredibly dashing and handsome... Though he has a rather interesting look of concentration planted on his face. He must be thinking about the objectives. As we all have important roles in this mission, Quatre has been placed as the all-seer for the whole casino...

I nodded back at him and I went off to blend in with the other waitresses. I see Trowa and Shiris head to the closer door and they disappear into the room. I walked swiftly to the back of the room where the other waitresses were heading in and out of a swivel door. I walk inside quickly, grab the nearest empty tray, and walk back outside before anyone notices.

I must be gawking at some of the people, since everyone looks so rich and powerful, it`s quite a sight to see! I scan the area quickly to get a feel for the room as I weave between people. I need to get my bearings so I can act as professional and act as normal as I possibly can. My heart skips a beat every time I see an armed guard. Some of them are marching back and forth between the tables of poker players. There are some wild people here tonight... considering three large men almost knocked me off my feet because they won some money playing roulette. I can only imagine how much money this casino makes!

I see Julie and Duo in the distance walking around freely observing the area like I am. Mulan and Wufei are some distance behind them. They must be waiting for Quatre to give them the 'okay' to proceed to their positions. I guess everyone is waiting for him now I suppose, as long as his cover doesn't get blown... we should all be alright.

"Would you care for a drink?" I say with a smile to a few people around the poker tables. They wave me off, barely paying attention to me and I continue my walk through the casino. This casino is so busy, there are people in every nook of this place! Hopefully that'll make Hiiro and Mayumi's sneaking around job easier.

I feel a cold chill crawl up my spine as I continue battling through the waves of people. The current seems so strong sometimes, I feel as if I'll fall flat on my feet if I don't hold my position firmly enough. It makes me hesitate and I hate that feeling. I want so desperately to believe in my ability in this team, but I can't help those 'what ifs' creeping into my head. It's poisonous really... everything riding on a split second, one single moment that could ruin this mission. Everything is counting on all of us to do our job and to do it right. Failure is not an option. Failure is not an option. Failure is not an option With each repeated thought I feel my knees start to shake. I am just- oh so very nervous! I cannot help this feeling deep inside me! How am I suppose to pull this off? I- I have no choice but to be perfect... However, I am far beyond such an ideal concept... such a impossible thing!

All I can do is put my fake smile on and continue through the crowd.


	35. Chapter 35: Mulan, Bet for Me

I see the pair in front of me turn around for a brief moment. I nodded toward Julie and Duo, to which they smile and began walking in a different direction. Wufei and I are posing a high end Chinese couple on a tour of the world. Wufei is a very powerful diplomat and I am his obedient wife...

I took my stance and held my head high and my posture poised and controlled, I`ve met enough rich Chinese snobs to know how to fake being one properly. I notice a few bystanders staring at the pair of us as we walk by... Not many Asians down in South Africa it seems. Some of the woman gawk at me, giving me the good up and down gaze, I guess I look like I am richer than them.

I see Wufei motion to me and we head over to watch the craps table awaiting Quatre`s instructions as to which table to proceed to. I look up and see a center section high up, overlooking the casino. I`m assuming that`s where Quatre is stationed by now.

"These people are all ignorant and stupid, they are simply giving the N.O.C. the money necessary to complete their operation." I hear Wufei mutter in Chinese to me. I turn and give him an anger look.

"No matter what language we speak in, we should _not_ be talking about our objectives. You do not know who can understand us." I add a nasty tone at the end of my sentence and I can see a few people staring at me. I'm assuming because I'm speaking in Chinese and not because I sound angry. Though, I would agree in his thinking that there would be no one here able to understand us. Someone suddenly taps me on my shoulder. It`s Steph, holding a tray and smiling at me.

"Would you like a drink ma`am?" She asked sweetly and I shake my head. Wufei turns around.

"Scotch. On the rocks." He asked sternly while adding a strong Chinese accent. I raise an eyebrow at him but he ignores me.

"Coming right up sir!" She says and turns to some other bystanders and asks them the same question. She then prances away to the kitchen. I watch as several men turn to watch as she glides away. She should probably stop shaking her hips so damn much! How naive is she? I wonder if Quatre can see that from the pit... I continue to study the room around me as I ignore the various people still staring at me.

"This is Quatre." I hear Quatre`s voice ring in my ears, "I have secured the security system and the N.O.C. leaders seem to be playing black jack at table 65 and 66 in the VIP section. There is only 3 men playing at table 65 and 2 men playing at table 66, I will relay information when I find the others. I suggest Duo and Julie play at 65 since they are pretty lively and Wufei and Mulan play at 66. I`ve added you to the VIP section for clearance. Over and out."

Quatre`s voice cut out and my ear drums recovered back to the noise of the casino. I turn to look at Wufei and he nods his head to the left to the back of the floor. There was an area in the back that was raised higher than the rest of the floor. I am assuming that is the VIP section, considering the whole section looks to be made of gold and with jewel lining all around.

Wufei presents his arm and I gracefully lay my hand on top of his and he leads me to the back of the casino. Heads turn as we walk by and I nod my head to a few people staring at us, as if I was royalty. We make our way to the VIP section. Wufei presents his beautiful forged VIP casino card toward the host. He looks at it for a moment before nodding us through and we proceed to the tables. I watch Wufei survey the area for a moment before leading me to table 66. I see two men sitting, sipping their drinks and tapping the table appropriately for the game.

Wufei pulls a chair out for me and I lightly sit down. He then takes the seat to my right. He pulls out a massive amount of cash from his coat pocket and hands it to the dealer for exchange. The two men were to my left and I watch as they glance at me for a moment, before continuing their conversation.

"Yeah, man... she cancelled on me." The man closest to me said in an un amused way, "Said she had `other business to take care of` and what the fuck does that mean?" He took a swig of his drink forcefully and slammed the drink down on the table. He had a gruff look on his face, with a few scars lining his features adding to his thick brown hair; the most noticeable being the huge gash down his right cheek. I watched him glance at me again and his bright green eyes shot a glint of light at me. The man next to him patted him on the shoulder.

"That`s what you get for trying to _buy_ a women`s time. Women... so unpredictable!" He said with a gruff laugh. This man looked much older, gray showing through his dark brown hair. He had a cigar in his mouth that puffed smoke into his dark brown eyes. Both of them had on dark blue suits with pin stripes. I noticed both had on one huge ring on their ring fingers that had the initials N.O.C. engraved in them in gold. Yup... they were the leaders alright.

"I know man... but she`s so _good_, you know? I can`t get enough of that one..." He said with a frown. I listen as the older man grunts a bit before speaking.

"Next time you see her, just show her who you _are_... you aren`t someone to be messed with. She`ll know who`s boss." He said and coughed a little from the smoke of his cigar. The younger man gave a mincing smile.

"Heh. Yeah... I`ll make her my slave." He said taking another swig of his drink. He then turns to the dealer, "Alright! Let`s get the games started again. I`m sure Mr. and Mrs. Chang want to get started too!" He laughs a bit staring at the dealer. Ironic how he actually got our names right... but I`m sure that`s one of the few Chinese names he can come up with. I watch the dealer gaze to his left and I see Trowa walk up to him, whisper something in his ear, and he nods.

"Sorry, everyone, it`s time for my break and you will now have a new dealer!" He says with a smile and moves out of the way so Trowa can squeeze in.

"Good Evening Lady and Gentlemen," Trowa says with a light bow, "My name is Damien and I will be your dealer for this evening." He then quickly begins cutting the decks and dealing our the cards with great ease.

"Evening Damien! Now let`s win me some big money!" The older man said with a laugh puffing his cigar smoke. I can hear cheering coming from the table next to us. I glance over to see three men sitting at table 65 on the right side and Duo and Julie on the laugh. Looks like they have already made friends with the members of the N.O.C... considering they are high-fiving, clinking their drinks together and laughing along. I see Shiris has already switched places and is dealing for their table.

"Shi shi." I hear Wufei say and I see Steph have come back with his drink. She smiles sweetly and proceeds to the next table to offer service. I watch the younger man lean back in his chair and watch Steph for a moment.

"I wonder if she`ll give me any _service_ this evening." He says with a laugh, "Since my schedule is open and all!" The man puts his hand on his chin for a moment, watching Steph.

"Yeah... these babes will do anything for money, I`d pull her aside later and ask her!" He said puffing for smoke. I can only imagine how Steph would handle such a task, she`d surely break her cover if placed into a situation such as that. She's far too innocent to fake such a thing. I glanced up at Trowa who was dealing our cards, but his gaze was focused on the other table. They were certainly a rowdy bunch as they fake such motions as trying to slap Steph on the ass... Pathetic. I can't wait to eliminate such simple men.

"These men are completely dishonorable." I hear Wufei mutter to me in Chinese. I nod my head towards him.

"Exactly... which is why they won't be around for much longer." I say casually. I wasn't paying attention and I suddenly seen Trowa flip over a card in front of me.

"21 ma`am." He says with a small smile.

"This lady sure has a hot streak!" I hear the younger man say as he eyes me. I keep my poise and collect my chips. I didn`t realize black jack was such an easy game to win. I`m barely doing anything. If our mission turns out to be as easy as this silly game I am playing, that would make my day.


End file.
